Tassilo
by Bavaria78
Summary: An enemy from the past brings back painful memories for both Jack and Matty. Will MacGyver and the team be able to take him down or will Tassilo hurt one of them again?
1. Chapter 1

AN:

Welcome back friends. In this story we learn a lot of the relationship between Jack and Matty. I've always missed an episode about that, but I have to admit I'm not even halfway through watching season three. I watched Mac+Fallout+Jack yesterday and I love it!

I don't own the characters, except Tassilo. Thanks to vegas nivel 3 for some advice.

Chapter 1

Jack gulped and gulped again. „Ah, is this … I don't know … some kind of weird experiment gone wrong?" He shot MacGyver a fearful glance.

The blond agent answered sourly. „Just stop complaining and eat!"

Jack stabbed carefully at the ugly looking and bad smelling piece of something on his plate. „Iˋm not that hungry man."

„Really? Ten minutes ago you were ready to eat a bear, your words not mine." Mac wasn't to fond of this dish either.

„We should have ordered pizza. Oh my god, pizza would be awesome right now." Jack sighed.

„Hey, it's not my fault that Matty sent Bozer on an extended training session on such short notice. I didn't want to throw the steaks away."

„Well, you can do it now, because I'm not eating this." The Delta shoved his plate away with a disgusted grunt.

Mac sighed. „Promise me not to tell Bozer? He'll kill me, this was really expensive meat."

„Deal!" Jack had already grabbed his phone and asked. „Peperoni?"

Mac grinned. „A big one."

They were still joking about the messed up meal, as they entered the war room the next morning. Riley was already there. „Did I miss something?" She asked.

„You won't believe it honey. Mac tried to kill me last night … with meat!" Jack bragged.

Riley frowned. „Meat. Seriously Jack?" She turned to Mac. „Care to explain?"

Mac cleared his throat. „Better not. We're here to work, aren't we?"

„Damn right blondie." A voice sounded from the door. They turned to see Matty enter the room. Jack immediately noticed the tension in her body. She took a deep breath and turned around.

„What do we have Matty?" Mac asked. They all had seen the grave expression on her face.

„It's Tassilo. He's back." Silence. Mac and Riley looked confused. „Are we supposed to know him?"

„Not you two." Matty answered and observed Jack.

Tassilo. A name that brought back such horror. Jack closed his eyes. Suddenly he was back in the cabin in the woods. The acid smell of burning flesh filled his nose. The screams were tearing through his ears like bolts. Helplessness. Restriction. Pain that was searing through his skull. White hot anger blinding him. The smell was overpowering, he couldn't breathe. Screams, pain, guilt, hate all at once. Hands on his arms, restraining him. He had to get free. The grip on him tightened. He felt something on his back He couldn't breathe. A familiar voice panicked. His shoulders shook violently.

„Jack! Jack, come on!" Mac urged.

Slowly the surroundings changed. Gone was the cabin. Jack was in the war room, sitting on the floor leaning against the couch. He had no idea, how he ended up there. His vision was blurry, his breathing laboured. Jack recognized Mac kneeling in front of him, his lips were moving, but Jack couldn't process the words. He couldn't get in enough air, his head lolled to the side, darkness was creeping in. Suddenly a jerk. His chin was gripped hard and Mac was yelling at him. „Jack look at me! You have to breathe buddy. Slow and deep breaths." Slowly the Delta was able to concentrate on Macs face. The room came into focus again. Concern was written all over the blond agents face. „Come on Jack, calm down, you're safe." He urged, rubbing Jacks arms in a soothing motion. Jack blinked and registered Matty standing beside him, he looked up at her. His own pain mirrored in her eyes. „It's ok Jack." She said softly. Jack lowered his glance, not able to stand it.

„Are you back with us Jack?" Mac asked. Jack nodded. Riley shoved a glass of water in his hands. Jack took it and almost spilled it, because his hands were shaking so bad. Mac helped him guide it to his lips and put it on the table behind him, as soon as the Delta had gulped it down.

„Let's get you on the couch bud." Mac helped Jack to sit down. The Delta ran a shaking hand through his hair. His breathing was still not back to normal, but at least he wasn't on the verge of passing out. Jack was awfully pale. „Gonna be sick," he groaned and ran out of the room to the toilet next to it. Mac started to follow his friend, but was stopped by Matty.

„He's gonna be ok. Give him a few minutes to get his shit together." She ordered.

Riley spoke up. „What the hell was that Matty?"

Mac answered instead of their boss. „A full blown panic attack, worst I've ever seen him have. You know why, don't you Matty?"

The small woman nodded. „Sit down. I'm gonna tell you. You know that Jack and I were working at the CIA together. We were sent out to a cabin in the woods in Montana, where one of our agents was assumed to hide. We got intel that Tassilo, that was his code name, had gone rogue and sided with the Russians. His real name is Brent Styles. Our job was to arrest him and bring him in to be interrogated. We found the cabin empty and started to search the perimeter, he shot Jack in the head." Matty closed her eyes at the memory. Mac escaped a fearful: „Oh my god!"

Matty cleared her throat and continued. „It was a graze, but a really bad one. He didn't even recognize me, when he came to for the first time. The next thing I know is that something hit me in the back of the head. I woke up in the cabin, restrained to a chair. Jack was lying on the floor, his head was still bleeding and his hands were bound with wire. He was unconscious. Tassilo brought him round and made him watch as he questioned me how much the CIA knew about his involvement with the Russians. It was pretty hard on Jack, because Tassilo …" she gulped „he used a hot iron to try to make me talk. I've never seen Jack so furious. He somehow managed to brake the wire around his wrists and lunged at Tassilo. They fought briefly, but Jack was in a bad way, his hands were a mess and Styles managed to escape." She shuddered as the image of the bloodied, badly cut wrists appeared in her mind. „Jack freed me and went after him. He shot Tassilo in the chest, he went over a waterfall and we assumed he was dead. Jack came back and patched me up, he got me out and brought me to exfil. He took care of me despite his own injuries, which were pretty serious. Our relationship hasn't been the same afterwards, he left the CIA when he was back on his feet and went back to Afghanistan. I think he has never forgiven himself for not being able to stop Tassilo from torturing me." Matty blinked a few times and turned to compose herself.

Mac and Riley were stunned. „I had no idea, he never told me. Jack once said something about letting you down." Mac was shocked. He rose. „I'm gonna see how he's doing." The blond agent left the room.

Riley stepped forward and laid a hand on her boss´ shoulder. „Are you ok Matty?"

The director turned around and was in control again. „I am. I'm just not sure how Jack will be able to handle this mission. When I first came to Phoenix we didn't go along very well. I'm sure you noticed it." Riley nodded. „I've never blamed him for what happened out there, he saved my life that day and I will forever be grateful for that. But I think, that's not how he sees it. We never really talked about it except on the flight back. I knew he was blaming himself." Tears were filling her eyes, but she didn't let them fall. „Jack begged Tassilo to burn him instead of me. He was in so much pain already, but to witness me being tortured was more than hard on him. He almost lost it. I tried to convince him in the helicopter, that it was not his fault. When we got back, we were both in medical. I was released after two days, but Jack was bad off. He had a high fever, because of an infection in his hands and the bullet had caused a severe concussion. He was out of action for months, because he couldn't use his hands. I was assigned to a new partner and was soon back in the field. We didn't see a lot of each other and I didn't want to remind him of Montana when I met him and then he left for Afghanistan." Matty sighed. „Jack seemed so angry, when I became his boss. I didn't know how to handle it, so I gave him a hard time until we reached some kind of truce. I think, I need to sit down with him and talk about it, when this mission is over."

Riley smiled. „That's a good idea. You're a great boss Matty." The two woman gave each other a quick hug, then Matty was back in boss mode. „Get as much intel on Brent Styles as you can. We start briefing, when Jack and Mac are back in here."

Mac entered the restroom. He dreaded in what kind of state he might find Jack in. His mind was replaying the information he had gotten from Matty. The protective nature of Jack always made him feel guilty when something bad happened to one of them. Mac thought, that it must have been the same when he was working with Matty.

Mac was grateful, that there was nobody else in the room. He knocked on the last stall, the door swang open. Jack was sitting on the floor, his head resting on his knees. He didn't look up.

„Hey brother, are you alright?" Mac asked softly.

„Yeah, peachy." Jack laughed a short humourless laugh. „I get it, Matty told you how I let her down?"

Mac sighed. „Well not exactly. She told us how you nearly got killed by Tassilo and how you saved her live. It wasn't your fault Jack, that she was tortured." He tried to reason with him.

„Nice try Mac. I was responsible for her safety. It was my job to keep her out of harms way. Good job Dalton." He added sarcastically. Mac kneeled down in front of his partner. „Look at me Jack." He ordered. After a moment the Delta raised his head. Mac was shocked by the expression on his friends´ face. Jack looked … haunted. „You know, that we can't always prevent bad things from happening. Our job is dangerous and we all know the risks. Sometimes a mission goes south and all you can do is to try to survive. That's exactly what you did. You got her out alive."

Jack snorted. „Didn't you wonder why she never wears short sleeves? I can tell you. It is because of the burn marks on her forearms, they'll remind her for the rest of her life, that I let her down. It's … you can't imagine …. the sound of …. sizzling flesh…. her cries for help … the smell …ugh" Jack leaned over the toilet and was sick again. Mac closed his eyes. He couldn't blame Jack for loosing his shit. Being forced to watch something so cruel done to your partner, it was a nightmare come true. He reached out a hand and rubbed Jacks back in soothing circles. The heaving had stopped and the Delta slumped back on the floor. Mac had wet a towel and held it out. Jack took it grateful and cleaned his face. They sat in silence for a few minutes. Jack took some deep breaths and stood up. „Let's go, I have a score to settle." Jack was back in Delta mode, but Mac knew, that Jack was suffering inside.

They entered the war room together and found a picture of Tassilo on the big screen. Matty looked at Jack, who only nodded at her. She started. „Ok, this is the situation. Styles was assumed dead, but his body has never been found. Obviously he survived. He is operating in Eastern Europe. Tassilo has become one of the biggest suppliers of the revolutionaries and terror groups in the area. His headquarter is in Chechnya, where most of his deals take place. Styles provides weapons of all kinds even planes and tanks. You need a group of mercs? He's the go to guy. We have to stop him once and for all. Your job is to arrest him and take him back to the states."

„Why don't we just kill him?" Jacks voice was as cold as ice.

„Because the Agency wants to question him. He may provide some useful intel." Matty answered calmly.

„So he can get a deal, or what? That's bullshit Matty and you know it. Tassilo won't say a word." Jack was clearly upset.

Matty was stone faced. „Enough! Are you up to take him into custody, or not Dalton? I can send somebody else with Mac and Riley. One more word and you are banned from this mission. So, what do you say, are you in or not?"

„I'm in. I won't make the same mistake twice and let him get away. You can count on me boss." Everybody could see, how tense the Delta was.

Mattys glance softened. „Ok, get your gear together. You're wheels up in twenty."

Riley and Mac left the room, Jack was the last to follow. „Jack! I want a word with you."

Jack turned and headed back into the room. He looked at Matty expectantly. „What is it boss?"

„Sit down Jack." The agent obeyed and waited for her to start.

„We never really talked about what happened. But we will. I just want you to keep your cool on this mission. Promise me not to do something stupid." Matty had grabbed his hands, a gesture that indicated how emotional she was about this particular mission. She tried not to show it, but Jack had known her for too long not to see it.

„I'll try." He sqeezed her hands for a second and rose to his feet. Jack was almost out of the room as her voice stopped him again.

„And don't you dare to get yourself killed Dalton!" The only answer she got was a chuckle, before the door closed.

Matty whispered. „Don't do this to me Jack!"

AN:

I know we have seen Matty in short sleeves on a party in season three, but let's pretend for the sake of my story, that she wore a long sleeve as usual.

Please review!


	2. Chapter 2

AN:

I'm overwhelmed by all the kind reviews. Thank you all so much for taking the time to leave me a few words, as well as following and favouriting the story. So, lean back and enjoy the next chapter.

Attila was the ruler of the huns in the 5th century in Europe.

Chapter 2

Jack was the last to enter the Phoenix jet. He went to the back of the plane, not joining Mac and Riley at the front as usual. Mac rose and went to sit opposite Jack. The Delta stared out of the window and hadn't even registered his partners presence. Mac leaned forward and laid a hand on Jacks knee. He wasn't prepared for the violent reaction of his partner. The Delta shot forward and grabbed Macs throat in an iron grip.

„Whoa, Jack! It's me, Mac. Jack come on!" Mac grabbed Jacks wrists. Suddenly recognition was visible on Jacks face. He paled and immediately let go of Mac. He fell back on his seat and murmured an apology. „Oh god, Mac. I'm sorry bud. I … I didn't mean to …"

„Hey, it's ok Jack. I know this is hard on you. I just want to help you." Mac soothed.

Jack sat there and stared at his hands lying in his lap. Macs gaze followed his. Then it dawned on him. „The scars on your wrists are from Tassilo, aren't they?" Mac hadn't noticed the marks for quite some time, because they were hidden under the black leather cuff and the tactical watch Jack was wearing most of the time. He had asked Jack about them, when he had spotted them, but the Delta had brushed him off.

Jack nodded. „I couldn't use my hands properly for month. The wire he used was rusty and I got a nasty infection. But it was good it was old, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to break it." Jack closed his eyes as the memory washed over him. He needed Mac to understand so he started to talk.

„ I was lying on the floor of the cabin. A sudden rush of cold water jerked me awake. „Hey Rodeo, time to join the show," Tassilo snarled."

„Rodeo?" Mac asked. „Yeah, we always used our codenames, when working for the Agency. I was Rodeo and Matty was Attila." Mac nodded. „Now I understand it, Matty the hun."

Jack agreed. „Yeah it kind of fits her. She's really tough, always has been. Tassilo knew, he couldn't make her talk by just hitting her or breaking her fingers. So he took the poker and heated it in the fire. I had trouble staying conscious, I couldn't see very well and was dizzy and nauseous. I must have passed out again, because Mattys scream brought me round. He had burned her arm with the poker. I was just lying there and did nothing, sure I begged Tassilo to burn me instead of her, but he just laughed and said later would be my turn. Matty was sweating and breathing hard, but in her eyes you could see her determination not to give in. He burned her three more times and I couldn't stop him. I let her down. It took me way to long to break the wire, I should have been stronger and worked faster. Finally I managed to get out of it, Matty was barely conscious and Tassilo was coming at her with the poker again. I barrelled into him and we fought, but he hit me in the head and I fell down again. Styles fled out of the cabin and I loosened the ropes around Matty. My gun was still there, I took it and went after him. It was difficult to follow him, twilight had set in and my eyesight was poor. But I found him, he turned around and aimed his gun at me, we got the shots off almost at the same time I think. I dived to the side and wasn't hit, but luckily my bullet got him somewhere in his upper body. He fell back and went over the dip right into the waterfall. I hadn't even registered at first it was there, only as I walked over to check where he had disappeared. When I returned to the cabin, Matty had passed out. I patched her up as best as I could, but there was only a small first-aid kit. I called for exfil and carried her there. Matty was in so much pain, but she never complained. The helicopter arrived an hour later. I got her in, but I don't remember much after that." Jack hadn't opened his eyes the whole time, he wasn't able to face his friend. When he finally looked up Mac saw a pool of misery, shame and guilt. The blond winced at the tortured expression on his partners face.

He reached out his hand and gripped Jacks, displaying sympathy. „Listen Jack. Nothing that happened there was your fault. The only one that is responsible is Tassilo. Matty doesn't blame you. I'm so sorry you had to go through this, but you have to stop and get rid of the guilt."

Jack shrugged. „You're wrong, she couldn't look me in the eye and we never spoke about what happened. You know I was not happy, when she became our boss. I was unsure, if we would be able to work together after what happened, but she is a professional. Sure she gives me a hard time, but she never brought it up and I'm grateful for that." Jack ran a shaky hand through his hair, but at least he seemed to be more in control than earlier.

„Jack, you were shot in the head. There was no chance you could have prevented what happened to Matty. It's a miracle, you did get her and yourself out alive, and Matty knows that."

Jack waved him off. „Yeah, whatever." And Mac immediatley knew, that Jack wasn't convinced. Grim determination showed on the Deltas face, when he said: „He's gonna pay for what he's done to her."

„And to you," Mac added and continued „just promise me to keep your cool and don't do something stupid."

„That's the same thing Matty said to me," Jack stated.

Mac grinned. „Then it's an order and you don't want to mess with Matty the hun."

A slight smile appeared on Jacks face. He rose and started for the front of the plane. „Let's make a plan, then. Riley get me the blue prints of the compound, where Tassilo is set up."

He studied them for a while. There was a huge main building with a few smaller buildings around. The satellite footage, that Riley had opened too, made it clear there was no easy access to the area. A high fence surrounded the compound, cameras, guards and a masssive gate. Jack pointed to a small square rig in one of the corners. „What's that, can you zoom in Ri?"

The hacker pushed a few keys on her laptop and they got a better look. Mac observed it for a moment. „Looks like a generator."

Jack nodded in agreement. „Emergency power supply. Ok, this is what we do. Mac you manipulate the generator and you have to set up an explosion on the other side. Nothing too big just a distraction, to get some of the guards out of the house. Riley you'll kill the power supply, they'll figure that the generator will fire up and so they probably won't have any night vison goggles ready to hand, but we will. We get in, grab Tassilo and get out as fast as we can. We don't have much time, but I think this is the best option. If anybody has a better idea, I'm listening." Jack looked at his team mates expectantly.

Nobody spoke, they were impressed by the tactical skills of their friend. Riley recognized what being a Delta meant. Discovering weakness in the enemy, getting the whole picture and formulating a plan took more than being a dumb knuckle dragger, Jack liked them to believe he was.

Mac smiled. „It's a good plan Jack. Way better than the schemes we usually come up with. I just have to look, what to use for the explosion." Jack grabbed behind the seat and shoved a backpack into Macs hands. The blond agent opened it and there was everything he would need. A smile spread over his face.

Jack answered the unasked question. „I thought we might need some fireworks." He looked at his watch. „We're still five hours out. I suggest we'll get some rest, before we kick Tassilos ass." The Delta turned around and walked back to his seat in the back of the plane.

Mac plopped into the seat beside Riley. After a few minutes they could hear soft snoring filling the silence. Riley looked at Mac. „Is he ok? I'm worried Mac."

The blond agent ran a hand over his face and shrugged. „Honestly, I don't know. This is a mess. I knew that Jack and Matty had a history, but I had no idea what they went through. This is really hard on him. He still blames himself for what Tassilo did to Matty and he thinks she does too."

Riley interrupted. „She doesn't. I talked to her in the war room after you left to check on Jack. Matty admitted, that they only talked about it when they were flying back from Montana. She explained to Jack, that none of it was his fault, but she said, that they didn't speak about the matter again."

„Well obviously Jack doesn't remember." Mac rubbed his temples, then it suddenly dawned on him. „Oh no! Of course he doesn't, Jack was shot in the head, he told me earlier that he doesn't remember a thing after they got in the helicopter."

Riley snorted. „That explains a lot. They have to sit down and talk this over, when the mission is done. Matty said as much. This has to be cleared up, so both can move on."

Mac sqeezed Rileys hand. „I just hope they can work it out."

„They will. I'm impressed by the plan Jack came up with, after observing the intel for only a few minutes."

Mac smiled. „That's what he's good at. Not only shooting the bad guys and beating them up. Jack is a soldier with great tactical skills, a born leader, focused and willing to give everything for his country."

„Yeah, and that's what scares me. I don't want to lose him, again." Riley sighed. She pushed her seat back and closed her eyes. Mac stared out of the window and whispered. „I don't want to lose him either."

Mac must have dozed off, he was startled awake by a shout. „NO!" He climbed out of his seat and ran back to his partner. Jack was having a nightmare, he was threashing around, his face a grimace of pain. Mac grabbed his shoulders, aware of the risk of being hit, but he didn't care. He had to bring Jack out of his self created hell. „Jack, wake up bud. Hey it's ok, your safe." He slapped the Deltas face lightly. „Matty … no … I'm sorry …" he whimpered. „Jack!" Mac tried again, louder this time. That had the desired effect and Jacks eyes opened. He was confused until he recognized where he was. Jack slumped forward, his head resting in his hands. Mac was on his knees and moved his hands in comforting motions along his friends arms. „It's ok Jack. She's safe. You are safe. Calm down brother."

Jack looked up, shaking his head. „I … I just can't get it out of my head. It's always the same dream. He's not only burning her arms, he's …" Jack gulped. „he's burning her face and she screams …again and again." Mac winced at the image. „How often do you have the dreams?"

Jack shrugged. „From time to time. It's always worse when I have an arguement with her or when the anniversary is coming up."

Mac closed his eyes as he realized the extent of the problem. „You never told me. Maybe I could have helped you, done something, I don't know. Oh man, I had no idea." Mac was feeling guilty, that Jack was suffering so much over all this years. He thought back to all of the nights, when Jack had brought him out of one of his night terrors. He had found comfort and reassurance in the strong arms of his partner. Sure he knew that Jack had fought his own demons, everbody who had spent time in the sandbox had. But he had no idea, how haunted the Delta still has been.

„I couldn't. This is something, I have tried to bury for years." Jack smiled a shaky grin. „We both suck at this, you know."

Mac smiled. „We are a pair, aren't we?"

„Yeah we would be a godsend for every shrink." Jack smirked.

„I bet, we could drive every shrink nuts in no time." Mac was relieved, that they were back to their usual banter. He knew, they had to address this problem, but that would have to wait. They had a mission to accomplish first.

Please let me know what you think!


	3. Chapter 3

AN:

Thank you all for the kind words, I really appreciate it.

Chapter 3

The sun was setting, when they landed in Chechnya. It was a small private airport. The team entered the waiting van and they discussed the details of their plan again. They parked about a mile away from their destination, hidden behind some bushes.

Riley pulled up an infrared image of the compound. „How many persons are there?" Jack asked as he peered over her shoulder. She whistled. „Eight outside and ten inside. That's a small army."

„Are there guards near the generator?" asked Mac.

„Yeah, but only two." The hacker let her fingers fly over the keys of her rig. „I'm in. I'm gonna show you the cameras, but once I've killed the power, we'll be blind." Riley warned with a concerned expression. She didn't like it one bit, that she couldn't help them after she cut off the energy.

„We've got the coms. And you have the infrared images, so you can keep us updated." Jack was focused on the screen. It showed several areas of the house. The hall, some kind of conference room, living room and an office. There were also two cameras outside the building. They could see the guards patrolling. „They men outside are heavily armed. Automatic weapons. The ones inside have at least handguns," he observed.

„Mac we start with the generator. We'll take out the guards and you manipulate that thing. Then we'll head over to the other side and you set the explosion. Riley, I'll give you the go to shut down the power. Ok, coms are working?" They checked their gear one last time and left the van.

„Hey guys, don't mess it up, ok?" Riley was tense. Jack turned around and gave her a quick hard hug. „We won't honey, I promise." He pressed a kiss into her hair and was gone.

Mac and Jack reached the fence, after a quick check Mac whispered. „No alarm attached to it." He pulled out a wire cutter and opened a hole big enough for them to slip through. They ducked behind the huge generator. Jack grabbed the first guard and snapped his neck with a fast efficient move. Mac had the other in a choke hold, but the guy was heavy and he drove an elbow back hard. With a woosh the air was driven out of Macs body and he released the man, but Jack was already there and drove an iron fist into the guys throat. His hands instantly went to his broken windpipe, a moment later he sank to the ground dead. Mac stood bent over on his knees, desperately fighting for air. „Are you ok there bud? This is going to be one hell of a bruise." Jack was concerned.

„I'm good, Jack. Gimme a minute," the blond agent wheezed. Mac slowly rose and rubbed the sore spot on his chest. He pulled out his Swiss army knife and began to work on the generator. Jack had his gun ready and observed the perimeter. „Done," announced Mac. Jack nodded and they made their way over to the other side, moving carefully in the shadows of the well lit compound. They reached a small shed, where Mac decided to set up his little bomb. He reached for his backpack and took out the things he needed for creating the device. With practised ease his fingers were putting the parts together in no time. „I'm ready, I've set the timer to 5 minutes, that should give us enough time to reach the side of the house." The blond agent said.

„Good job. Riley, get ready. When you hear the explosion, you wait another 30 seconds and then shut down the power. Don't do it to soon, we want at least a few of the men out of the house." Jack ordered. „Copy that, Jack. Good luck!"

Mac started the timer and the crouched along the side of the shed. They used bushes and cars for cover and reached the house without being spotted. Jack checked his gun and looked at his watch. He motioned two minutes with his fingers. Mac nodded and waited. They put on their night vision goggles and looked away not to be blinded by the explosion. Suddenly there was a loud BOOM and chaos broke out. Two men were taken out by the explosion, Jack noticed it with a slight smile. Four down fourteen to go. They saw five men leaving the building, that left only four in the house and Tassilo. Not bad odds. A moment later all the lights went out. Jack entered the building through the side entrance, Mac right behind him. The first man was coming at them in the hall. He had pulled out his cell and used it as a torch, but he still recognized the enemy in front of him too late. Before he could get a shot off, he sank to the ground out cold.

„There are two coming from the right side." Riley informed them. Jack and Mac turned and lunged at the bad guys the moment, they stepped into the hall. Mac brought his fist down hard at the wrist of his enemy, who lost his gun instantly. He send another punch to the jaw of the guy, but he managed to turn a bit so it did no real damage. Instead the other man sent an iron fist to Macs midsection, which sent the blonde to his knees. Mac rolled and kicked the feet out of the guard. He brought his elbow up and hit the other in the temple, sending him to sleep.

Jack was still fighting the other guard, blood running down his face from a cut above his eye. He feigned a right hook, but came up with a vicious kick to the gut of the man, who fell to his knees. A solid punch to the jaw knocked him out.

„Jack behind you!" Rileys voice cut through the coms. Jack turned and grabbed the guy and snapped his neck. „We took out four, so where's Tassilo?" The Delta did the maths.

„You're right, there is only one heat signature left. He's in the office."

„Ok, let's go! Mac you alright?" The blond agent nodded and said. „Yeah, I'm good." Suddenly they heard a rumbling noise coming from the basement. „What's that?" Jack asked confused.

„Damn it, that's another generator. This guy is paranoid. We better hurry." Mac urged. Suddenly the lights went on and the Phoenix agents were blinded, because they still had their night vision goggles on. „Fuck, fuck, fuck …" Jack swore and ripped the device of his face. He took out his gun again, but his eyesight was not good.

„Well, no need to be discreet now. They'll be coming in hot." They ran down the hall and had almost reached the office, when the first shots rang out. Mac ducked as a bullet splintered the doorframe bedside his head. They took cover behind a closet and Jack fired back taking out two of the men. Mac took him by the elbow and pulled him into the next room. It turned out to be the kitchen. The blond smiled. There were always things to blow something up in a kitchen. Jack contacted Riley. „Sweetheart can you tell me how many of them are in the hall? This asshole had a second generator in the basement." Riley worked her rig furiously. „The infrared shows six, but I'm still blind. I think I killed cameras with my action. Sorry guys."

„Hold them off a bit longer and I'll rig something up." Mac was already busy, looking around for something to use. Jack fired out of the door and changed his magazine. He looked over his shoulder and cursed. „We're trapped in here Mac. There's only a closet."

„That's enough to provide some cover for us." He took a bottle of cleaner from a board and looked at the label, it contained nitric acid. Perfect! He ran over to the fridge and took out a plastic bottle of mayonnaise. Jack saw it and shook his head. „What the hell are you doing? Making yourself a sandwich?" He got off shot after shot, but the bullets slamming into the kitchen door told Mac, that there were still too many bad guys left. He removed half of the mayonnaise, filled the bottle with the nitric acid and fastened the lid tightly. He put it in the microwave and started it. „Jack, let's get into the closet now." The Delta shot another round and then joined Mac in the closet. Only a minute later four guards entered the kitchen, guns at the ready and scanning the room. They were nearing the closet, when the microwave exploded and sent them to the floor out cold. Jack grinned. „Dude, did you just make a bomb out of mayonnaise? That's rad."

Mac shrugged. „Use what you have." They pushed open the door and stepped over the unconscious men. Jack moved slowly out into the hall, before he could react a shot rang out and he felt a searing pain in his right shoulder. He was pushed back by the force of the bullet and slammed into Mac, who reached out to steady his partner. Jack grabbed his shoulder and tried to find out where the shooter was. Suddenly he felt Mac sag to the ground behind him. Jack turned and was met with a gun, that slammed into his temple. The Delta got a glimpse of his unconscious partner before he slipped into darkness.

Pounding. Someone was pounding on the door. Why didn't Bozer open the door? Mac tried to stretch and get up from his bed to look, who was there. Stop. Why couldn't he move his arms? And this was not his bed! Again the pounding. Suddenly everything made sense. Tassilo! The bad guys obviously got the drop on them and the pounding came from inside his skull. Mac blinked to get rid of the fuzziness. He saw legs in cargo pants dangling beside him. Mac gulped, nausea rising in his belly. He feared, he might see the dead body of his partner, when he looked up. Deep breaths, Mac. It took him a few minutes to gather the courage to let his gaze wander up the legs. He gasped in relieve. They hadn't hung his partner. But a second glance did nothing to calm Mac down. It was bad. Jacks hands were tied tightly with rope, that was fastened to a large hook in the ceiling. He was out cold and the right side of his chest was covered in blood and the bleeding hadn't stopped yet. These motherfuckers had hung him so high, that his feet weren't touching the floor. Mac winced as he imagined the strain on Jacks hands and shoulders. Add a gun shot wound to that, it must be excrutiating pain, his brother had to endure. The coppery smell of the blood filled Mac nostrils and he lost the fight with his stomach. He turned his head to the side and vomitted all over the floor. The motion set a blast of pain through his skull. The blond agent closed his eyes and groaned.

The sound of retching made his way through the fog, that was somehow clouding Jacks brain. He wrinkled his nose in disgust. He frowned. He knew the sound. Mac! Now Jack was wide awake. His head jerked upward and pain exploded in his shoulders and hands. It was so bad, it almost sent him back into darkness. Mac! Need to stay awake, for Mac. Jack forced in a few deep breath and slowly the world swang back into focus. A low groan made him look to the left side of him. There was his partner, tied to a chair and blood running down his temple. Macs head hung low and the vomit on the floor confirmed that the blonde had a concussion. The concern for his friend made Jack push his own pains aside and focus on Mac instead.

„Aw Mac. Look at me bud. Mac? Can you hear me? Come on pal, you're scaring me. Talk to me." Jack urged.

„…ate pukng," Mac slurred. Jack was relived to hear, that Mac was awake. „I bet bud, me too, but at least I'm not the one to have to clean it up. Must be a first." Jack teased.

„I hate you." Mac groaned again, but lifted his head. Two dazed blue eyes met Jacks stare. „How you doin brother?" Jack couldn't hide his concern.

„I'm alright. That doesn't look good." He observed Jacks shoulder with worry. Jack was well aware, what Mac was referring to, but he wouldn't add to his friends burden.

„Vomit never looks good, bro."

Mac rolled his eyes and regretted it instantly. He gasped for air, as another wave of pain and nausea rolled over him. „Easy Mac, slow breaths. In and out. Nice and easy." Jack coached his partner through the sensation.

„Well, isn't that a cute thing to witness?" A cold voice from the door cut into Jacks soul like a knife.

Tassilo stepped into the room, behind him one of his guards who dragged a struggling Riley in. With a brutal shove he threw her on the floor. „Asshole," hissed the hacker, as she landed hard on her side.

„Riley! Are you ok?" Jack tried to assess, if she was hurt. There was a bruise on her cheek, evidence of a hit she had taken.

Riley looked over to Jack and gasped when she saw the blood on his shirt. „Jack! You're shot." She turned away as she admitted. „They got the drop on me, I didn't see them coming, sorry guys."

„It's ok, we're gonna get out of here." Jack was furious, that they had hurt his girl. He tried hard to compose himself. The Delta shot Tassilo an icy glare. „You know I'm gonna kill you for hurting them." He stated calmly.

Styles broke out into a loud laughter. „Oh how I missed this Rambo-like overprotectiveness you have concerning your partners. You haven't changed a bit, have you Jack? Still the you-will-pay-the-price-if-you-hurt-my-friends guy. It's hilarious. How could a hard-nosed CIA agent be such a softie at the same time? You're a tough guy Jack. I respect that, but this" he pointed to Mac and Riley „is your weak spot. This is going to be so much fun. A pity we don't have a firepit in the house, but I think I can come up with something entertaining as well." A sadistic smile appeared on Tassilo face.

Please let me know what you think!


	4. Chapter 4

AN:

Thanks again for reviewing, following and favouriting the story.

Warning: There's some torture and graphic situations in this chapter, maybe not suitable for all readers.

Chapter 4

They grabbed Riley and tied her to a chair. Another guard had entered the room and stood beside the door. Jack tried to reason with Tassilo. „I know, it's me you want to hurt and kill. Why don't we make a deal? You can torture me as long as you like and kill me afterwards, but let the two go."

„Do you know what I learned back in that cabin in Montana? That it hurts you more than anything else, if I torture one of your friends. Don't deny it, I've seen how you look at them." Tassilo shook his head. „Didn't you learn anything from that mission? That getting attached to your colleagues only makes you weak?" Jack just glared at him. Mac and Riley remained silent, there wasn't anything they could have done or said, that would help their situation. Tassilo was clearly a sadist and no amount of pleading would stop him.

Tassilo watched Jack for a moment, then he stepped forward and backhanded Riley with brutal force.

Jacks body flopped in a fruitless attempt to get free. „You sonofabitch! I'm gonna break every single bone in your body, you asshole. Beating up a defenseless woman, are you proud of that?"

Tassilo shrugged unfazed. „I just like it." He grinned. Jack struggled against his bonds, blood was running down from his wrists.

„Calm down Jack, getting you riled is just what he wants." Mac pleaded.

„Yeah, listen to your puppy Jack." Styles rounded Mac and Jack held his breath, he knew Mac was the next. He was right. A right hook slammed into the blond agents face, knocking him out. Jack was afraid. Mac already had a concussion, hits to the head could easily kill him.

„I think, we're gonna take a brake now. I'm gonna get some toys together, you should have called Jack, I wasn't prepared for a visit from you." The three men left the room and Jack breathed a sigh of relief. Mac was still out. „Riles, are you ok?" Jack asked concerned. She nodded. „Yeah I'm fine, but you don't look to good. You lost a lot of blood and it's still bleeding and your hands …." she trailed off.

„Don't worry about me, honey. We have to get out of here ASAP or this is gonna be real bad. Mac! Wake up buddy, we need your big brain now." There was no reaction, which worried Jack immensley. „Riley, can you loosen the rope around your hands?" The hacker shook her head. „I'm trying Jack, but I don't think I can get out of them alone."

„It's ok girl, don't worry." Riley looked over to her mentor. „I'm scared Jack, Tassilo scares the shit out of me, he will kill us slowly, won't he?"

„That's not gonna happen. We'll get out of here together, but we need Mac to wake up." Jack was determined which comforted Riley a little bit.

Just as Mac began to stir, the door opened again and her tormentor entered the room with two of his sidekicks. They were carrying all kind of instruments to torture them. Jack gulped, he just hoped Tassilo wouldn't use any of this on Mac or Riley, but at the same time he knew, that the madman would exactly do this.

„I've considered letting you pick the toy we use on your friends Jack, but then I realized you would go easy on them and that would only be half as much fun as I intent to have." He took the first piece, a cattle prod and weighed it in his hands, as if considering if it would serve the purpose. A grin appeared on Tassilos face and he neared Riley. „So, do you care to tell me for which agency do you work now? I know it isn't the CIA anymore, but I'm curious. So which one is it?" His question was met with silence. Riley didn't show her fear. Tassilo sighed. „A stubborn little girl you are, aren't you?"

„Fuck you!" Was the only answer he got from the hacker. „Ok, suit yourself, I asked nicely." Tassilo raised the instrument. „No, please don't." Jack pleaded. Something Styles clearly enjoyed to hear. His arm reached out and he thrust the cattle prod into Rileys chest. But obviously Tassilo had underestimated the dainty woman. Riley clenched his teeth and didn't cry out loud, only a low groan escaped her lips. She slumped in her seat as the source of pain was removed.

„Bastard! Come on untie me and we fight this out like men, you scumbag." Jack raged and fought again to get free.

Tassilo laughed. „My day just gets better and better." He grabbed the next piece of the table and Jack knew that Mac would be the one to bear the brunt of it. The Delta remained silent though not to worsen their situation further. „What about you? You really don't look like an agent. Is your company so desperate, that they hire high school kids? So be a good boy and tell me who your boss is?"

Mac just shook his head, a motion he immediately regretted. The room began to spin wildly. He took a few deep breaths to brace himself for what was coming. The madman slipped the brass knuckles on his hand and drove his fist into Macs ribs. The air was forced out of the blond agents lungs and he began to wheeze. Tassilo hit Mac again and again and Jack wasn't able to contain his rage any longer as he heard Macs ribs brake. He began to kick in the direction of Styles. One of his henchmen came close to Jack to stop him from kicking, but Jack brought his feet up really quick, at the same time he pulled himself up with his aching arms. He slung his feet around the mans neck and twisted his body with a force born from blind rage and desperation. It happened so fast nobody in the room was able to react. The trapped man tried to bring up his hands, but a snap stilled his movements forever. Jack shoved the dead body away from him, enjoying the expression of utter disbelief on Tassilos face. Mac and Riley couldn't believe what they had just witnessed.

Rage was turning Styles face into a grimace. He grabbed a whip from the table and stepped behind Jack. The snap of the whip was accompanied by the sound of tearing fabric and slashing flesh. Jacks back arched with the agony searing through his back. He bit down on his lip so hard it started bleeding. Other than a low groan no sound could be heard. Lash after lash was brought down on his back causing indescribable pain, not only on Jack, but on Mac and Riley as well. It seemed like an eternity until Tassilo had satisfied his blood thirst. Jack had luckily passed out. Mac was gasping for air, not only because of his broken ribs and Riley had turned away, not able to stand the sight of Jack being whipped.

Tassilo slammed the whip on the table and left with his remaining sidekick. Mac stared with horror at the blood, that was slowly dripping from the whip onto the basement floor. A low groan was indicating that Jack was coming round.

„Oh god Jack!" Riley cried, tears running down her face. „Calm down Ri, we need to get our shit together if we want to get out of here." Mac tried to soothe. „Jack, I need you to wake up bro. I have an idea, but I don't think we have much time." He urged. Another groan and a slurred „..m still ere" showed Mac that Jack was indeed awake. „Listen Jack, I know you're hurting badly, but I might have an idea to get us out of here. Unfortunately it will be you, who have to do most of the work. As usual." Mac added an often used joke between them. Jack lifted his head and managed a weak grin. „Whadaya wan me do, hoss?" The thick Texas drawl was another sign how bad off the Delta was.

„Ok, this is a screw hook, your hands are fastened to. I saw it move a little, when you broke the guys neck. You just have to twist your body around, use your feet against the wall, and you can srew yourself out of the ceiling." Mac explained. Riley vetoed. „He can't do it Mac, he's injured too badly."

Jack grinned. „Well, I'll have to do it or we are screwed, aren't we?" Mac smiled and Riley was shocked. „Really Jack? You have to joke in a situation like this." She shook her head.

„Sometimes …. you have … no … sense of … humor Ri," Jack managed through clenched teeth, he was already twisting his body around and the hook moved with him. He couldn't suppress a whimper, and had to stop several times to stay conscious. He couldn't remember if he had ever been in greater pain, but the thought of his kids depending on his strength kept him going. „It's working, don't stop big guy!" Mac encouraged his partner. At the same time he felt immense guilt, because he knew that Jack must be in agony from the gun shot wound and the whipping, not to forget his hands and wrists. Surprisingly it took Jack only five minutes to turn around enough times until the hook gave way and he tumbled to the ground. He had stopped speaking, his world consisting of agony, the only thought that kept him going was to get his friends out of this hell. When he fell to the ground, the room was getting gray and the sounds were muffled. „Can't pass out, can't pass out," he mumbled, trying to slow his breathing. He didn't know how long it took him, but finally he was able to get on all fours to scramble over to Mac and loosen his restraints. As soon as Mac was free, the blond agent wobbled over and untied Riley and removed Jacks rope as well. Mac was sure he had at least a couple broken ribs and a nice concussion to go along with it. Jack was still on all fours leaning on his elbows and desperately fighting against unconsciousness. Riley crouched beside him hesitantly where to touch the Delta not to inflict more pain. She decided for Jacks upper arm and rubbed it in a small way to comfort Jack. „…m ok, jus eed a mnute." He wheezed.

Mac carefully cupped Jacks head and lifted it. „Jack, I'd rather patch you up now, but I don't think we have enough time for it." Jack nodded, his eyes full of pain, but astoundingly focused. „Help me up. Can you pick the lock?" Mac observed the table full of torturing instruments and shuddered. He unrolled a bag of tools and sighed in relief. He picked a small awl and had the door open in less than thirty seconds. Jack grabbed a knife and Riley took the cattle prod.

The hall was empty. „How many do you think are still there?" Mac whispered, swaying dangerously then leaning on the wall for support. Jack looked at him concerned. „You ok hoss?"

„I'm fine, well at least better than you." That got him only a grunt in response. „Honestly, I can't remember how many we took out, but I assume at least six to eight." Mac nodded in agreement.

They slowly croached forward, when a guard turned the corner. Before he could raise an alarm Jack threw his knife and hit the man in the throat. With a gurgling sound the guy sank to the ground. „Nice hit Jack," Riley commented. A pained chuckle came from the Delta. „I aimed for his heart, but I will take it anyway." He wobbled over to retrieve the knife, almost doing a header to the ground. He had to hold on to the wall to straighten up again, he took a step and collapsed. „Whoa, easy there big guy." Mac was on his side in an instant. „Breathe buddy, take your time."

„No time," Jack wheezed through the haze of pain. Mac knew, his partner was right but it nearly killed him to see the strong agent in such agony. The blood from his back dripped onto the floor, his pants were already saturated with it. Even in the dim light of the basement Mac could see how pale Jack was. The Delta needed medical attention soon. But first they had to get out of here.

The trio managed the stairs without a hitch. They took cover behind a closet just in time before another guard walked by. Mac grabbed him in a choke hold and didn't let go until the man was unconscious. He swallowed against the rising nausea. Jack shot his partner a grateful look. Riley crossed the hall and took cover on the other side, from there she could overlook the entrance area. She indicated four men with her fingers and motioned to the back. Mac and Jack understood, they would have to use the back door. No way they would be able to fight four of the bad guys in their current condition. Riley came back to them and whispered. „The back door is just around the corner on the end of the hall." The agents nodded and made their way slowly in the direction that promised freedom. The trio set their eyes on the back door, as it began to open. „Damn it," Jack cursed and they rushed through the next door.

„Hello my friends," the voice that sent shivers down their spines greeted them.

Sorry for the cliffhanger, but I couldn't resist. Please review!


	5. Chapter 5

AN:

I hope you've got your breath back after the whump fest in the last chapter ;-)

Thank you for all the kind words!

Chapter 5

Slowly they turned around and Jack began to speak. „We were bored down there, so we started to look for you, return some of the favours, you know what I mean." The Delta snareld. There were two more men in the room with Tassilo. It was a big living room, with couches, carpets and decorations. Three on three, they had often faced worse odds. Mac neared on of the sideboards.

Tassilo laughed his dirty laugh. „You want to fight it out Jack? Come on, you can barely hold yourself upright. This will be over way to quick."

„Scared that I beat the crap out of you? You've always been a dirty coward Styles." Jack provoked the man.

Tassilo removed the gun from the small of his back and let it fall to the ground a few feet away from him. „What do want us to do with the other two boss?" One of his henchmen asked. „Grab them and take them down to the basement, we'll deal with them later."

As soon as Jack lunged at Tassilo, Mac and Riley started to attack the other two men. Riley fell to the ground and grabbed the carpet, where the guard stood on. She pulled with all her might and the guard totally surprised by her move went down hard and hit his head on the floor. Riley jumed on him and began to use the cattle prod on him. After a few bursts of electricity she began to hit him with her fists. Fuelled by the anger, that had built up in her since the mission had started. The bad guy managed to get in one punch and stunned her, but she didn't give up and took his head and smashed it down on the floor. The man was out cold. She rolled of him and breathed heavily.

Mac had grabbed a bowl from the sideboard, that was decorated with sand and candles and threw it into the face of his opponent. The man let his gun fall to the floor and grabbed at his eyes. Mac kicked the gun away and began to throw punches, but the guy was big and was soon hitting him back. Mac knew, he wouldn't last long in his condition so he had to fight dirty. He brought his foot up and kicked the guy in the balls hard. He fell down to his knees and Mac drove his elbow between his shoulder blades, sending him to sleep.

Jack and Tassilo were going hard at each other. The madman fighting with the thirst for blood, but Jack was fuelled by anger and fury about what Tassilo had done to Matty and his friends. Adrenaline was supplying his body with what was needed to stay upright and fight the most important fight of his life. Styles delivered a punch to his gun shot wound and Jack almost passed out, he staggered back a few steps and shook his head to clear his head. Tassilo smiled, that was enough for Jack, he would wipe that sick smile out of the other mans face for good. With a roar Jack came forward again and delivered a combination of hooks and upper cuts to Tassilos head. Another two blows to his midsection, followed by and iron fist into his face finally knocked him out. Jack wavered on his feet and looked over to his friends, he was so focused on Tassilo, he didn't know how they had fared.

Jack saw with pride that Mac and Riley had knocked their opponents out. He registered with concern that a new bruise was forming on Rileys face and Mac was holding his injured ribs breathing hard. The Delta was worried about the kids health. Suddenly Rileys eyes widened in horror, she shouted „Jack watch out" and threw the gun from the guard over to him at the same time. The Delta caught the gun, turned and fired in one swift movement, just a split second before Tassilo could get a shot off with the gun, he had pulled out of his boot. Jack emptied the gun into the chest of Styles and shouted „this is what you get for hurting my friends, burn in hell asshole!"

Suddenly they heard shots outside. „I just hope this is the cavalry," Jack mumbled weakly and sank to his knees. Riley had moved beside Jack to steady him, while Mac peered out the door to gauge what was going on. „It's a Phoenix TAC team," he sighed in relief. The blond agent wasn't sure if he had anything left to fight more bad guys. Soon the firing stopped and a Phoenix agent named Justin entered the room to clear it. He lowered his gun after recognizing his colleagues. „I found them, we're gonna need a medic in here!" The agent assessed the situation, which wasn't difficult by the looks of the three.

Jack got to his feet. „Let's get out of here first, you can patch us up on the jet." He only managed two more steps, when his body betrayed his words and the Delta collapsed to the floor unconscious. Justin managed to grab Jack just in time, so he didn't hit his head on the floor. He stared with horror at Jacks mangled back. „Jesus, has he been whipped? I need the medic in here NOW!" He shouted in his coms. Mac kneeled on the floor and tried to rouse his partner. „Jack, can you hear me? We need to get you to exfil, come on bud open your eyes for me, please!" Mac tapped the Delta lightly on the face and was rewarded with the flutter of Jacks eyelids. A groan accompanied the unfocused look. He lifted his head and hissed in pain, clearly fighting hard to stay awake. The door opened and Paul their long time medic rushed in, letting his eyes travel over the three patients and recognizing, that Jack was really bad off. He sank down and felt for Jacks pulse. „Pulse is weak, I need to …"

„Whatever you need to do, will have to wait until we are at the jet, we've got visitors 5 mikes out. We gotta go now." The TAC guy interrupted. „Sorry Jack, this is gonna hurt, we help you up now and walk out of here." The medic and Justin each took one of Jacks arms and pulled him carefully to his feet. Mac hovered in front of his partner to lend a helping hand. The Delta screamed in agony as they took his arms and pulled them over their shoulders. His eyes started to roll up in his head. „No, no, no Jack! You're not passing out now bud. Stay with me, I know you can do it. Look at me brother, focus on my voice. I know it's hard, but you have to hang on a little bit longer, ok?" Mac took Jacks face in his hands and willed his brother to stay conscious. Slowly Jacks eyes began to focus on Macs face. A pained smile appeared on Jacks face. „I got him Mac, I shot Tassilo, he can't hurt my friends anymore."

Mac nodded. „You did good big guy, let's go home and tell Matty." Jack just grunted in response. Slowly they made their way out of the house, where a van was already waiting for them. As soon as everybody was on board the jet took of. It was a little crowded with the TAC team, but nobody minded. Everybody got out alive, they didn't lose a man.

Jack had passed out when they got him into the van. He was still out when they lowered him carefully on the couch. Paul hooked him up to an IV drip and started a blood transfusion as well. „I need to cut his shirt off, there's a lot of fabric embedded into his wounds. I'm going to give him a dose of morphine, that'll take the edge of, but it's still gonna be painful."

Mac had taken the position by Jacks head and asked. „What can I do to help?" The medic answered: „Stop him from thrashing around and try to calm him down once I start." Mac nodded and grabbed one of his friends limp hands. Tears were filling his eyes. He's never seen Jack so badly injured before. Shot and whipped, bruises on his face from the fight in one word his body was a bloody mess. He looked over to Riley, who had Matty on a video call and updated her on the mission. „We're out of Chechnya Matty. Tassilo is dead, Jack had to shoot him, he … oh god Matty …" Riley broke off, not longer able to put up a brave front.

„Is he alive?" Matty feared the answer, you could see it on her face. „He is Matty, he is. Sorry for making you think … but he's bad really bad. Paul is working on him now."

„Show me!" Her boss ordered. „Matty, I don't think that's a good idea." „Now," Matty barked and Riley turned her laptop around with a sigh. „Oh god. Damn Dalton, how did you manage to do this?"

„Tassilo whipped him, for killing one of his men while cuffed to the ceiling."

„I'm glad he killed that motherfucker. Bring him home. I want an update on his condition every hour. How are Mac and you?"

„I think Mac has broken ribs and he got his bell rung. I'm ok, just a few bruises, Matty."

„Good to hear, try to get some rest."

„I will boss."

The medic started to remove the remnants of Jacks shirt. Despite the morphine Jack began to whimper. It was a heartbraking sound, nobody on the plane had ever heard from the Delta. Everybody was silent, normally the mood was light after a successful mission. This time it was subdued by the serious injuries of their leader. Jack had picked every member of the TAC team personally, he trained them regularly and was proud of the group of elite soldiers he had formed. Every single one of them would die for Jack, seeing him in such agony was hard on them all.

The medic had removed the biggest shreds of the shirt, now he started to pick out all the little pieces with tweezers. Jacks back was bleeding badly, the portable heart monitor confirmed this with an alarm signal. The medic looked up and saw, that the IV and blood bags were empty. He changed the bags for new ones and muttered. „Giving your heart something to pump, don't stop big guy."

After what seemed an eternity he had removed all the shreds and cleaned Jacks back. The Deltas eyes shot open and he started to scream. „Whoa easy Jack. He has to clean your back, it's over soon, I promise, just hang on brother. I got you." Jack grabbed Macs hands so hard, the blond agent thought his fingers might brake, but he didn't care, if it would help Jack just a little he would gladly accept it.

„Thanks Mac," Jack breathed through clenched teeth. „You're welcome buddy."

Paul covered Jacks back with gauze and bandaged it as good as possible, which was not an easy task with such a big wound. „How you're doing Jack?" He asked his patient.

„Peachy," Jack grunted. The medic smiled. „I had hoped you would say this, because I have to dig that slug out of your shoulder. You can't lie down, so we're gonna sit you up and you can lean on Mac, while I probe for that bullet, ok?"

Carefully they moved the Delta into a sitting position, Jack tried to be silent, but he couldn't hold back a whimper. „I know it hurts and I'm sorry for that," Mac whispered in Jacks ear.

„…ve nothin be sry fo," Jack slurred, fighting to stay awake. The heart monitor started to blare again.

„Breathe Jack, nice and slow, you know the drill bro, show me you can do it," Mac coached and soon the monitor stopped to complain. „Good job, Mac!" The medic praised him and started to search for the bullet. It only took him a few minutes to find the bullet and clean the wound. He hurried to get the stitches in so they could Jack make more comfortable. The Delta had passed out again. Paul felt his forehead as Jack started to shiver, his skin cold and clammy. „He's going into shock, let's lie him down. We need to elevate his feet and keep him warm."

Riley brought a few cushions, they put under Jacks feet, it was a bit akward, because Jack had to lie on his stomach. The medic checked the IV's again and then turned to the other two Phoenix agents with a sigh.

„So, who's next?" They simultaneously pointed at the other. „She!" „He!"

The medic handed Riley an icepack for the bruise on her face and started to examine her. After a few minutes he was satisfied, that there really were mostly bruises apart from a single burn mark from the cattle prod, on which he applied some salve and a bandaid.

„So Mac, just do me a favour and make my job not overly difficult," Paul asked with a tired voice. Mac understood, that tending to Jacks injuries was hard on the agent, he was a member of the TAC team as well and so he didn't have the emotional distance a hospital doctor would have had.

The blond agent nodded. „Isn't really a place I can hide here, isn't it?" He joked.

The medic smiled. „No, it isn't and I would rat on you!" Mac sighed and sat down and the medic started his examination. After a few minutes he sat back and said. „Looks like at least two broken ribs and a grade two concussion, you'll get xrays and a CT scan once we're back at Medical. I'm gonna bandage your ribs, then you can rest, but no sleeping. Mac nodded and sat down beside Jacks head, taking his partners cold hand in his. „Hold on bro, just hold on!"

Please review!


	6. Chapter 6

AN:

Thank you for staying with me. Your support is just great. I'm no medical so don't shoot me for the mistakes I've made. It would be great, if you would leave me a few words.

Chapter 6

Mac was nodding off on the flight back, but Paul didn't let him sleep for longer than 30 minutes before waking him up and checking his cognitive status. After that he moved to Jack, who seemed to rest peacefully. A worried frown appeared on his face, which spiked Macs fear for his friend. „What is it Paul?"

„He's running a fever, not too high yet, but it'll increase until we're back at Medical. I'm gonna start him on IV antibiotics but there are probably still some small fibers in his back, until they aren't removed the meds won't be very effective. All of his wounds need to be cleaned out again soon." Paul wasn't able to mask his concern for the Delta.

„He's strong, he'll make it. Jack is way to stubborn to die because of Tassilo." Mac said more determined than he actually felt. Inside he was scared out of his mind to lose his partner. Sure, Mac had seen Jack injured before, held bedside vigil way to often for his liking, but the memory of his mangled back would haunt him for a long time to come. Then there was the mental aspect to consider. The revelation, that Jack didn't remember the talk he had with Matty on their flight back from Montana all these years ago told Mac that there was a lot what had to be processed between Matty and Jack. Oh god, he just hoped they would get the chance to make things right between them again.

Mac sighed and got a bowl with cold water, he knew it wouldn't help much against the fever, but maybe it made Jack a bit more comfortable. He began to wipe the Deltas neck and forehead with the wet cloth. Jack began to murmur incoherently. „Jack, can you hear me bud? You're safe man. We are on our way back to Phoenix right now." He glanced at his watch. „Just a couple more hours to go and we get you to Medical, where they'll take good care of you."

„…ome"

„What?"

„… nna go home." Mac kneeled down to get a better look on Jacks face. His eyes were open, his pupils blown so wide his eyes appeared black. Mac smiled. „Good to see you're awake big guy. How are you feelin´?"

„Like I got mowed down by a freight train and dragged along a couple miles."

„Well, I can't deny, you look exactly like that is what happened to you. How's your pain?" Mac did a poor job keeping the concern out of his voice and Jack noticed it. He stretched his hand out and grabbed his friends hand tightly, not able to suppress a groan. „Not too bad, as long as I don't move. Relax Mac, try to get some rest. What did Paul say about your and Rileys condition?" Jack felt guilty he hadn't asked before.

Mac looked over his shoulder where Riley was sleeping soundly, snuggled into a blanket. „She's ok. Just some bruises and a slight burn mark from the cattle prod."

Jack made a noise, that sounded almost like a sob. Tears welled up in his eyes. „I'm so sorry I couldn't stop him from hurting you both. It happened again, I swore to myself that I wouldn't let him hurt one of my friends ever again. I failed. I failed Matty and I failed Riley and you. I'm so sorry." The tears were running down unchecked now and Jack got really upset. He struggled to get in air as his breathing became laboured, he tried to rise because lying down on his stomach made supplying his starving lungs with oxygen much more difficult.

Mac grabbed Jacks face between his hands. „Look at me Jack, you have to calm down now. Just breathe, come on you know this is a panic attack and you know what to do about it. We've both gone through this so often. So breathe with me bud nice and slow." Mac took an exaggerated breath and Jack tried to follow, but his position and the immense pain he was in made it impossible for him to draw in some air. Suddenly Paul appeared with an oxygen mask and a portable tank. He slipped the mask over Jacks face and said to Mac. „Let's get him sitting up, it's gonna be painful but he needs to calm down." The medic pointed at the heart monitor, that screamed that Jacks heart was beating way to fast. „His body can't take much more strain. Come on bro, let's sit you up." Paul carefully took on arm of the Delta and Mac took the other. Slowly the eased him in an upright positon. Jack tried to suppress a cry of pain, biting down on his lip so hard, it started to bleed. The world was spinning way to fast around him and Jack felt the nausea rise, he gulped hard, while still gasping for breath. He was miserable, dealing with the sick feeling, the pain and the dizziness along with the shortness of breath was more than his body was able to process and he slipped into unconsciousness.

„He's out!" Mac cried in panic. The commotion had woken up everybody on the plane. Riley sat there pale and shaking, not able to do anything than stare with horror at what she feared, was her father figure dying. The members of the TAC team standing up, feeling useless for not being able to help their boss. Mac thought the alarm tone of the heart monitor, indicating a too fast heartbeat, was the worst sound he had ever heard. He had NO idea. The worst sound by far was the ongoing tone, that told them that Jack was flatlining.

„Lay him down on his back, quick!" Paul ordered. „Mac you do the breathing, I pump." They were in position only a second later. Mac gave two breaths and Paul started with the chest compressions. It was silent apart from the medics counting and an occasional „Come on Jack!" from Mac. The others all stood, watching the scene horrified. The Phoenix TAC team was a close knit family and Jack was the link between them and the field agents. A minute passed, then another and nothing happened. You could see it in their faces, that they were losing hope, when suddeny Mac screamed „I got a pulse, I got a pulse!" The heart monitor started with a beep, then another. Tears were streaming down Macs face, but he didn't care and he wasn't the only one on the plane, who couldn't hold his emotions in check. He took one of Jacks hands and sqeezed tightly, with his other hand he stroke Jacks face. Mac was overwhelmed by his feelings, shock, fear and joy were rushing through him leaving him shaking and confused. Paul slipped the oxygen mask back over Jacks face and watched the heart monitor displaying that indeed his heart rate was stabilizing. The medic sank back on his heels and ran a shaking hand through his hair. „That was way to close for my liking Dalton. Don't you ever do this to me again." Paul allowed himself another moment to pull himself together, then straightened and turned to one of his colleagues. „How long until we reach Phoenix?" The man left to ask the pilot and was back shortly after. „ETA one hour, I told him to speed up a bit."

„Thanks mate, I just hope we get there in time. Riley call Phoenix and get Matty on the line for me."

Paul had started to work on Jacks back. The CPR had caused the bleeding to start again and the medic removed the soaked bandages and applied new ones.

A minute later Mattys concerned face appeared on the screen. She gasped, when she saw the pile of bloodied bandages and Paul covering Jacks back with fresh gauze. „What happened?"

„He went into cardiac arrest. We got him back, but it took us a few minutes. The CPR put a lot of strain on his back. Matty, tell Medical to get an OR ready and a surgeon in stand by. Some of these whip lashes gonna need stitches, a few are so deep the bone is visible. He's stable now, but we're an hour out and he's still bleeding and running a fever." Paul grabbed another Saline bag and removed the empty one.

„You're doing great Paul. Medical will be ready. The helicopter is already waiting on the airfield. Bring him home." The screen went dark and nobody would ever know, that Matty broke down in the war room. She sank onto the couch and cried. Not able to imagine the horror the people on the plane must have felt, when they saw Jack coding. Matty had seen Jacks back on her last call, but there were the remnants of his shirt hiding the worst lashes. She couldn't believe the extent of his injuries, so much blood. „Don't give up Jack! We all need you." She whispered and cleaned her face. The small woman straightened. She had a job to do and if getting everybody ready for Jacks arrival was the only thing she could do to help, she was all in.

Jack whimperd. At first it was so silent, Mac was not sure if he had imagined it. But then he heard it again. The blond agent felt guilty, because he was relieved to hear it. They came so close to never hearing a sound from Jack. Mac leaned down to his friend and murmured in a calming voice. „It's gonna be ok Jack. You're gonna be fine, we're landing in a few minutes at the airfield." The pained sound got louder. „Hurts," was the only word Jack managed.

Paul administered another shot of morphine to his IV line. „Easy Jack. The morphine will kick in soon." The medic rubbed Jacks arm. He looked at Mac. „I only gave him a slight dose to cover the time until we reach Phoenix. I don't want him to get upset again."

Mac nodded. „Thanks for bringing him back Paul."

The medic shook his head. „You helped as much as I did."

Mac looked over to Riley, who hadn't said a word since Jacks heart had stopped. „Are you ok Riles?"

She glanced at Jack. „No. I'm gonna be ok, when he's ok." She simply said. Mac nodded in agreement. The man lying there had saved the life of almost everone on the plane, some more than once. Jack had pulled Mac back from the edge of darkness several times in the past. When he couldn't find his way back into a „normal" life after Afghanistan. Then the Delta was there to pick up the pieces after Nicki. A solid anchor when the nightmares tried to pull him away with them. Jack was simply the foundation Mac has built his life on, the only real constant he could trust to not leave him, not willingly anyway.

Jack had renewed his relationship with Riley. It was a bumpy road at first, but watching the two together looked like seeing a proud dad interacting with his daughter. A role Jack easily slipped into. Sometimes Riley acted, as if she was annoyed with Jacks overprotectiveness, but silently she enjoyed, that there was somebody who cared so much about her. Even with Elwood back in her life, Jacks status hadn't changed. He was still the one to turn to, when she needed a fatherly friend.

Landing and transferring Jack into the helicopter went smoothly and didn't take more than five minutes with so many hands willing to help. Only Mac and Paul were riding with Jack, to allow the medic to tend to Jack if neccessary. Soon they arrived the Phoenix building, where the team from Medical were already waiting on the roof. Mac breathed a sigh of relief, when Jack was taken into Medical. He was terrified that Jack might be coding again. He was not sure if he would have been able to handle that one more time. Mac walked into the hall outside the OR as if in trance. He stood there like a lost puppy it seemed to Matty as she approached her agent. Mac didn't notice her at first, so she took his hand and waited for his reaction. The expression on Macs face was heart breaking, fear and desperation were shining from his eyes.

„Sit down before you fall down," Matty ordered gently and steered him to a chair. „We lost him, Matty. For a few minutes he was gone, Paul finally brought him back. Oh Matty! I'm scared, what if he doesn't make it? I … can't lose him … all that blood … and … his screams … he whimpered Matty. I've never seen him in so much pain." Mac hung his head, the adrenaline that had kept him going leaving his body, taking his strength with it. Matty waved over a nurse. „Mac you need to get checked out. You can't do anything for Jack as long as he is in surgery." The blond agent had no energy to argue with his boss, so he followed the nurse into one of the exam rooms. Later, he couldn't remember the CT scan or the xrays, he was sitting on the exam table again and didn't know how he got there. Mac was about to leave, when the Doctor came in. „Not yet, young man. I'm gonna bind your ribs now and this wound on your temple needs a couple of stitches."

„What about Jack? How is he?" Mac was anxious to get some news on his partners condition.

„He's still in surgery, but it won't be long now. I talked to Matty. Jack needs to be in ICU and you need to stay at Medical a couple days as well. It is unusual but we will settle you in the same room with Jack, because we know you wouldn't leave his side anyway." Macs face brightened. „But," the Doctor continued, knowing he had the upper hand now, „only if you promise to obey doctors orders, that means if we tell you to lay down, you will lay down, or we kick you out of ICU, is that understood?"

Mac nodded eagerly. He would promise everything, just to be with Jack. Riley walked into the room, just as Mac was finished. She looked awfully pale. „Riles, are you ok? Did they check you out?" The hacker nodded. Mac made a step in her direction and she retreated. Mac held out his hand, but Riley shook her head. „Not. Mac … I … just can't … no … if you touch me now … I'm gonna lose it. On the plane … I … I thought he was dying, he … still might. Please no! No, no, no, no, no." The tears she tried so hard to hold back, were breaking free. Mac pulled her in his arms and they both held onto each other as if their life depended on it. No words were spoken, sharing tears as well as worries over their father figure and seeking comfort in each others embrace.

Please review!


	7. Chapter 7

AN:

Sorry, it took some time for this chapter to get posted, but I was busy. Anyway, enjoy and maybe leave me a few words, what you think about it. Thanks for the reviews of the last chapter.

Chapter 7

Riley felt Mac begin to sway in her arms. She looked up and registered that Macs eyes were pretty unfocused. „Damn," she cursed. „Come on pal, let's get you sitting down." The blond agent nodded and regretted the motion immediately as the room tilted and his legs gave out. Riley managed to cushion his fall and shouted for help. A moment later the doc and a nurse were back and together they maneuvered Mac into the bed. The doc checked his vitals, peered into his eyes again and nodded „he's ok, just totally exhausted. Let's move him over to ICU, Jack's already there.". Matty stepped into the room and took Rileys hand. „You did good today Riley."

The hacker turned away and uttered a harsh laugh. „Good? Really good I did. Couldn't get the cameras going again, managed to get caught, oh and don't forget standing helplessly by as Jack was coding. Yeah, you could say I really did it this time." She didn't care about the sarcastic tone she used with her boss, she was way beyond that.

„Look at me Riley. You had a good plan going in. Nobody could have foreseen, that they had a second generator. You held your ground and I'm really proud of you for that. Then you took one of the bad guys out, which was crucial, because I don't think neither Mac nor Jack would have been able to fight one more guy. Your fullfilled your role as part of the team, I can't ask for more of my agents. There are always factors and variables we're not able to figure out and be prepared for. Things happen and missions go south and we deal with it, the best we can. Tassilo is dead and Jack will recover. I know how tough it was, but you made it out alive and Styles can't hurt anyone of us ever again. Let's count this as a win." Matty saw, that her words had reached Riley as some of the tension left her body and she managed a weak smile. „You're a great boss, Matty."

Matty smiled. „I know and now go home and rest, boss orders. Jack is out of surgery, he's holding his own. I give you a call, if something changes, I promise." „Thanks Matty," Riley whispered and left Medical.

Oh man! Couldn't he wake up in Medical once without being attached to that damn heart monitor! He just hated that thing. Beep, beep, beep. The whole time, apart from the time when you get a little excited. Then this piece of shit would blare it all around that you were trying to get out of bed or dealing with a flashback or nightmare. Nevertheless Mac reached out a hand and searched for the sensors on his chest. He frowned, there weren't any. Slowly he pried open his eyes. Although he thought he was prepared for the pain the blinding light would cause, the pain tore through his head light a bolt. He groaned and closed his eyes again. Mac worked his lids open just a slit, then a bit more until he was able to bear the brightness of the room. It took a few minutes for his vision to clear, that he was able to take in his surroundings. Other than an IV on the back of his hand, he wasn't hooked up to anything. The heart monitor beside him led to the other bed. Jack! He threw back the covers and began to climb out of the bed. Just sitting up made him incredibly dizzy and nauseous. His broken ribs began to scream in agony. Black spots appeared before his eyes and it took all he had to keep from passing out. Deep breaths, that's what Jack always tells him. After a while his stomach settled a bit and he was able to focus again. Very carefully Mac stood up and leaned against the bed, gripping the IV pole to keep him upright. Breathe Mac. Slowly he wobbled over to Jacks bed. It was not an easy task to maneuver his IV pole and not get tangled up with one of Jacks machines. Mac sighed. There were so many. Not a good sign. He scolded himself. What had he expected? To find Jack sitting up in bed flirting with the nurses? For the moment Mac was just happy, that Jack had made it through the surgery and was still breathing. The blond agent lowered into the recliner beside the bed and took in the sight of his brother.

Jack was lying on his stomach, of course. He didn't wear a hospital gown and the covers were drawn down to his hips. The Deltas back was covered with bandages from his shoulders to his waist. There had to be another bandage high on his chest, where the docs had removed the bullet. Jack head was turned so that he faced Mac and the blond agent didn't like the pasty color of his partner nor the fine sheen of sweat on his forehead. On his neck Mac could see a central venous catheter where several lines were going in. Saline, antibiotics, pain meds and a blood bottle were hanging on the IV pole. Mac shuddered. He knew a CVL was a neccessity, but the sight of it creeped Mac out every time, he saw one. That it was Jack, who was sporting it, made it only worse. He closed his eyes, a silent tear running down his face. With an angry move he brushed it away. Pull yourself together!

Mac reached out his hand and took Jacks, being careful not to touch the bandage around his wirst. With his thumb he began to rub the Deltas palm. Mac didn't like how hot and sweaty his friends skin was. He gulped hard, swallowing the bile that tried to escape. Focus Mac! Jack needs you. So he began to speak in a low comforting voice.

„We've made it Jack. We're back at Phoenix. I know, I know you'd rather be home, but this has to wait until you're better bro. It will take some time, but you will get better. Just don't give up on me, you hear me? We were in this situation way to often, mostly you the one holding bedside vigil. I never gave up on you and always came back, so you owe me that much. Don't give up on me, come back to me Jack," his voice broke at the last words and he had to take a few breaths to compose himself.

Doctor Ward came in and checked on Jack. The older man was part of Phoenix Medical for several years now and was familiar with both Mac and Jack. He was one of few physicians, that understood the codependency of the two agents and never tried to keep one away from the other, when they were in Medical. Mac raised his head. „How is he?"

The doctor sighed „Mac I won't lie to you. His condition is life-threatening, he's lost so much blood and he's running a fever. The injuries to his back are severe and there is the GSW to consider. We are fighting on numerous fronts right now. His body can't take much more. It's up to him now." After a moment he added „and maybe to you. I often witnessed how he draw you back from the abyss. We can do surgeries and administer meds, but it takes more to heal a body. I don't talk about miracles, that's nonsense. What I talk about is the subconscious mind, something we can't operate or treat with drugs, but a place where you can reach your partner, reassure him, encourage him to fight and not give up. It's no use, if we talk to him, we wouldn't reach him there. But you can Mac, you can pull him back. There's no guarantee he will survive, but with you by his side his chances are better."

Doc Ward laid a hand on Macs shoulder and gently sqeezed. „But promise me one thing Mac, don't run yourself into the ground. You need to rest too, young man. You're not helping your partner if you pass out from exhaustion. I'll let you sit with him for two hours, then an hour in bed. Do we have a deal?" „Three," bargained Mac. „Two and a half," countered the doc. Mac reached out his hand and they sealed the deal.

Doc Ward left the room and Mac was alone again with his partner. He was scared. The revelations from the physician didn't surprise him, he knew that this was serious shit, but to hear it spoken out loud made the threat of losing Jack more real. The blond agent shook his head. „No, my friend that's not gonna happen. You will survive, or do you want Tassilo to win? Surely not! We still have so much to do Jack. So many bad guys to chase, terrorist groups to take down and you have to have an eye on Elwood, so he doesn't mess up with Riley again. She is … it was really hard on her, to see you …" Mac ran a shaky hand over his face and rubbed his aching temples. „Damn Jack! It was hard on everyone there on that plane to see you dead for a few minutes. What were you thinking? Should this have been one of your sick jokes? Like stealing a corpse for Halloween?" Mac buried his face in his hands and began to weep, deep heartbreaking sobs ripped through his body. „What kind of shit did I just say? Forget it Jack, just wake up buddy, I need you so much. My life is just … empty without you in it. I am empty without you. You were the first person in my life, that made me feel … I don't know… worth the effort. To be enough. Bozer is a great friend, don't get me wrong, but you … you are the missing piece, that made me whole. The one who could look me in the eye and see it all. My messed up soul, the longing for a connection and the fear of being abandoned again. I don't know, how you do it, but I couldn't hide my emotions from you since we first met in the sandbox." Mac wiped away his tears, they made his headache worse. He took a few sips of water to settle his stomach and watched his brother. His vital signs seemed at least stable for now. He reached out his hand and stroke Jacks head, a motion the Delta had used so often to comfort Mac and even now the blond drew strength from it. He just hoped Jack could somehow feel his presence.

The door opened and Mac expected a nurse or a doctor to come in. He was surprised to see that it was his boss. Matty stood on the other side of the bed and took in the sight of her injured agent. She gulped and began to speak quietly. „You know, I saw him injured before. Badly injured, but nothing compared to this. How the hell did he manage to fight Tassilo in that state?"

Mac answered. „He didn't only fight Tassilo. He took another one out with a knife. He could barely walk, but he was so determined, full Delta mode, to get us out of there." He couldn't look his boss in the eyes. „It's my fault Matty. He got whipped because of me. They had him hanging from the ceiling by his wrists. Tassilo hit me and broke my ribs. Jack was furious, he started to kick wildly. One of the guards tried to stop Jack and he broke the neck of the guy with his legs. Tassilo grabbed the whip and literally ripped the flesh of Jacks back until he passed out. I've never seen something so cruel in my entire life." Mac gulped and lost the battle with his stomach. He grabbed the bowl a nurse had placed in easy reach and vomitted violently. Matty circled the bed and rubbed his back in a soothing motion. „Lay down Mac. You need to rest. I know about your arrangement with Doc Ward and" she glanced at her watch „your time is up. At least an hour in bed. And to make one thing clear, this was Tassilos fault and nobody elses, so don't you dare to blame yourself for it!" Mac made no move to leave the chair so Matty raised her voice in boss-mode. „I can put you in a regular room, Mac. I won't stand by and see you kill yourself. Imagine what Jack would say. He would have my hide for it." That triggered a smile from Mac. „Would you …" Matty nodded. „I'm gonna stay and have an eye on him, on both of you," she said softly.

Mac rose from his chair, only then noticing how stiff and sore his body felt. He was dead on his feet. Maybe the doc was right. Slowly he shuffled over and climbed awkwardly back into his bed. Matty helped him push his IV pole into position. Mac was out like a light, when Matty looked over five minutes later.

She pushed her chair a little closer to the bed and reached for Jacks hand. Matty wasn't normally a woman, who displayed emotions, but right now she didn't care if anybody saw her holding Jacks hand. „You really did it this time big guy. I think we need to have a word or two about your job description. Being an overwatch doesn't mean you should get yourself killed for your teammates." She looked over to the sleeping form of her other agent. „I get it, that he triggers the urge to protect him in you. With his puppy eyes and innocent look. Gosh, he still looks like a teen, when he's sleeping. But you can't kill yourself protecting him, you need to work on your self preservation. What do you think would do it to him, if you die? Leaving him like his mother did? It would destroy the kid." Her voice became a whisper. „And me Jack. When I first took the job after Thornton I was scared. Yes, scared when I saw how young and selfless Mac was. Then I met Riley a tough girl, but also too young to know much about the bad guys out there. Add Bozer to the pile inexperienced, easy to scare and simply to nice to be a real good field agent. My first impulse was to turn around and run away, because I didn't want to be the one tell their families they had died on a mission I couldn't even tell them about. But then I saw you and the look in your eyes, when you watched them and I knew they were safe. It all made sense. You wouldn't let anything happen to them, if you could help it. I know, they were injured several times and you beat yourself up about it, but they could have gotten killed out there on almost every single mission. They always came back because of you Jack. You gave me the confidence and trust to stay behind in the war room and help from there." Matty sighed. „I know we need to talk about Montana Jack. I have to make things right and I will, but I need you to wake up and get better first. So please hold on big guy." Nobody saw the silent tears Matty allowed to fall.

Please review!


	8. Chapter 8

AN:

Oh so many kind words. Seriously you guys are the best. Thanks. Enjoy!

Chapter 8

Time had lost all meaning to Mac. He didn't know what day of the week it was. For Mac it was simply day four. Day four and Jack was still hanging on. The doctors had kept the Delta in a medical induced coma for the last days. They decided to reduce the sedatives now, because they feared that Jack might not wake up again if they kept him under much longer. Mac was exhausted, he followed doctors orders and laid down when they told him to, but his own injuries and the constant worry over his friend took their toll on the blond agent. It felt like every day brought on a new threat for Jack. At first it was the shock and the blood loss, then his heart was beating irregularly and now they were battling the danger of pneumonia, because of lying down without any movement for too long. There was fluid in his lungs and his breathing was a little laboured. The medical staff came in several times a day and got him sitting up and do some massages and PT on Jack. Mac couldn't stand the sight of his brother hanging limp in the arms of the nurses. It was hard to believe that his partner was still in there, in this broken, beaten shell of a body once blooming with health. No! Mac wouldn't give up on Jack, the Delta was the strongest person he had ever met, if anybody could beat the odds it was Jack.

Guilt was weighing heavily on Mac. „I'm so sorry Jack that you got hurt because of me. Honestly I would trade places with you if I could. You shouldn't suffer so much, just because of defending me. I really appreciate that you always have my back, but not this Jack. Tassilo almost killed you." Mac gulped hard. „I just can't get the sound of the whip out of my head. So much blood, your blood, it should have been me. Oh god, sorry Jack, sorry, sorry…my fault, sorry" He broke off, crying openly. The all too familiar nausea was rising its ugly head again and Mac grabbed the bowl, that was never far away these days. After he was done, Mac rinsed his mouth with water. The heart monitor beeped a bit faster and Mac stared at it with horror. After a moment he calmed down, Jacks heart rate was higher than normal, but not so much that an alarm was triggered. The blond agent sighed and laid his head on the bed right beside Jacks, so their foreheads touched each other. The blond needed the physical contact to reassure him, that his brother was still there. Soon the beeping of the monitor announced that Jacks heart had fallen back in his regular rhythm and Mac let sleep pull him under.

Jack was floating, drifting along. A strange feeling. He felt no pain, just a weird numbness. Everything felt strange. Maybe he was dead and he was on his way to …. Damn! Oh, sorry Lord. He shouldn't swear, but probably he wouldn't go to heaven anyway, not with his record. But going to hell, where all the bad guys, he had killed, were probably looking forward to his arrival, didn't seem fair either. Oh man, wasn't there a place somewhere in between, where guys like him could go, not really good people but not that bad they needed to burn in hell? It was too late now, wasn't it? Something got Jacks attention. A sound, no several different noises. A voice, somehow familiar, underlined with a beeping sound. Wait, that sounded like a heart monitor, and that was Mac speaking. Mac, his boy! What was he saying? He was apologizing. What the hell, had the kid to aoplogize for? Oh, sorry Lord. Sorry for Jack getting hurt? A name: Tassilo. The memories came back. The basement. Riley hurt with the cattle prod and Mac beaten to a pulp with brass knuckles. Jack killing one of Styles men. Tassilo using the whip on him. Anger welled up in Jack again. I'm gonna kill that bastard for hurting my team. Wait. He shot Tassilo, didn't he? Yeah, the fight in the living room. Then nothing. Macs voice broke through the fog again. „… your blood, it should have been me. Oh god, sorry Jack, sorry, sorry…my fault, sorry". Mac don't blame yourself buddy, it's not your fault. He needed to talk to Mac, but he simply couldn't get his body to work. It seemed other than his hearing none of his body functions were working. Jack couldn't open his eyes, lift his head, speak or at least move his hand to let Mac know, he could hear him. Damn! Sorry Lord, but this is bullshit! My boy needs me and I'm nothing more than … than a useless pile of meat. Come on help me out, if not for me, for Macs sake. I can't let him blame himself. But no matter how hard he tried, he was trapped in his body. The sound had changed. Mac didn't talk any longer. Maybe he got some rest now. What was that? Crying. Aw kid, I just want to hold you and tell you, everything is gonna be alright. The weeping was worse than Mac blaming himself. The kid was always so self-controlled, trying to keep the walls around his soul intact. To hear him loosing his shit, was almost Jacks undoing. Oh no, now he was puking, he couldn't stand it any longer. The heart monitor confirmed his agitation with a faster beeping, but not so much to raise an alarm. Damn it! God, is that all you got? I have to help my boy, not scare him with a raised heart rate. Some help you are. A moment later he felt something on his forehead. What was that? A soft swish of air mixed with a hint of vomit hit his face. Macs head, the kid had positioned his head against his own. Good boy, I need you here with me. Jack calmed down and let go.

Mac was alone again with Jack. The nurses had left after checking on the Delta again. His voice was hoarse because of the hours of monologue. The blond agent couldn't recall most of the things what he had told Jack in the last days, probably mostly science stuff. „It always gets on your nerves when I'm telling you about physics and chemistry. But you know what I found out? You're the one who is stealing my science magazines. I'm not sure, if it is because you're interested in these things … no probably not … I noticed you picked up a thing or two about science, when we were out in the field and I improvised something. It is, because you want to understand me better, isn't it? Secretly creeping into my head to see what's going on in there. Am I right?" Mac sighed. He knew he was talking nonsense again, but normally it was Jack who put a halt to it. He closed his eyes.

„…ightmre"

Macs eyes shot open. Had he imagined? „Jack?"

„Mmh"

„Jack, oh god am I glad you woke up brother! What did you say? I didn't get it."

Jack let out a groan and opened his eyes, they were not focusing. „…give me nightmare, bein´ your head," he slurred.

Mac laughed, tears running down his face. „You're probably right there buddy. How you feelin´?"

„like bein´ put in meat grinder" The blond agent sobered. „You're not that far of the truth Jack."

„you ´k?" That was typical Jack, lying there half dead and asking about Macs health.

„Yeah I'm fine. Don't you worry about me."

„..lways do" Jacks eyes started to close, but his hand adjusted his grip on Mac. „I'm here Jack, I'm not going anywhere. Rest brother."

„..s my line"

„Already arguing, heh bud?" Mac smiled, but Jack didn't hear him, he was already asleep.

Mac sighed, grateful that the drugs were working obviously. Jack didn't seem to be in pain, just groggy. He pushed the call button. A moment later Doc Ward appeared. „What is it Mac?" One look into the blond agents face told him.

„He woke up Doc, he was pretty groggy, but aware. He asked me how I was." Relief was pouring from Mac.

The Doc smiled. „He's a tough son of a gun." He stepped near the bed and checked Jack over. He nodded satisfied. „Please call me, when he wakes up again," with that he left the room.

When Jack woke again, he immediately sensed that there was something wrong. The chair beside his bed was empty. His vision was blurry, so he blinked until it cleared up a bit, still no Mac. Jack was worried. Had he dreamt that Mac was there? He was so confused, couldn't concentrate. Was this all real or another weird dream? The Delta focused on his surroundings again, there was the annoying sound of the heart monitor, so it seemed he really was alive. He moved his head a little and felt a slight stabbing in his neck. Only then he registered all the lines, that were leading to the side of his throat. With all the strength he could muster, he reached up with his hand. A CVL. It kind of annoyed him, that he knew the term for that shitty thing, they had stabbed into his neck. So it was bad. A low moan caught his attention. Jack rose his head a little and saw the other bed in the room. He couldn't see the face of the other patient, but he recognized the pityful sound. Mac! Why was he in ICU? Tassilo must have hurt him more than the blond agent let on. Nothing new on the I-am-fine-don't-worry-about-me-Jack-front. Panic overwhelmed Jack. The heart monitor seemed to be agitated too, because he sped up his beeping. What was going on with Mac? Internal bleeding? Skull fracture? Every single horror scenario came alive in Jacks mind. He had to help his boy, he just needed to get out of bed. Determination was a force, Jack was never short supplied with. His breathing got laboured and the pain in his back awoke like a wild beast. The heart monitor decided to send out an alarm signal which Jack didn't even register. The Delta held his breath and pushed himself up on his arms. The fire that was rolling over his back almost made him black out. „Can't … stay awake ….Mac" muttered Jack through clenched teeth. He brought his legs around and the room began to tilt. „Mac!"

The blond jerked awake with the strangled cry. His concussion took him a moment to get his bearings. Then he saw Jack about to fall out of his bed. Mac couldn't believe Jack had managed to get into a sitting position, but he didn't look good. His face was as white as a sheet and his gaze unfocused. Lines of pain were deeply embedded into the face of the agent, but there was something else. Grim determination and worry, an expression Mac had seen so often on his partners face. He threw back his covers and stumbled over to Jack, who was losing his balance and tipping forward. At the same moment the door opened and Doc Ward with a nurse on his heels rushed in, but they wouldn't be in time to break Jacks fall. Mac reached out his hands and was able to grab Jacks shoulders as he slumped forward with a cry of pain. „Whoa, easy Jack. Where do you think you're going big guy? I gotcha brother. Easy, come on breath!" Jacks head lolled on Macs shoulder, he was barely conscious now. „Mac?" The Delta wheezed, not able to say more. He felt the world dim, not able to understand what the voices were telling him. Hands were grabbing at him and he felt the pillow on his face. Mac? He needed Mac, Mac needed him? Everything was a blur and darkness came and took him away into nothingness. Doctor Ward and the nurse were busy getting Jack settled back into the bed and checking him over. Jacks heart rate settled down after a few minutes and Mac breathed a sigh of relief.

„What happened?" the doc wanted to know. „I have no idea. I was sleeping and then I heard Jack call out for me. When I looked over he was sitting up in bed and was about to fall over." Mac explained.

„What? He managed to get up alone?" The physician shook his head in disbelief and continued to exam the Delta. He frowned. Mac asked, not able to hide his fear: „What is it doc?"

„I don't like the sound of his breathing. It's too wet, He's still bordering on pneumonia." Doc Ward grabbed a nasal canula to supply Jack with oxygen.

„But he will be ok?" The Doctor looked over to Mac and understood why Jack so often called him kid or boy. The agent looked not older than sixteen, sitting on his bed, pale, with eyes wide open, not able to hide the fear of losing his mentor.

The doc tried to reassure Mac. „He woke up and managed to sit up, which is a good sign. The next time we'll give him a hand. Moving will be painful for him, but neccessary to ward off the pneumonia. He's a Delta Mac. I've treated a lot of them, while I was in the army. They are special. Born to fight and never give up, no matter the costs. You are the reason he won't stop fighting, we just have to help him a bit along the way."

Mac nodded. The doc was right. It was Jack, they were talking about. He would make it and Mac would be with him to help him get better.

Please review!


	9. Chapter 9

AN:

Thanks for sticking with me. I didn't think the story would go this length, but sometimes your characters have their own opinion and you just have to let them be. Thank you all so much not only for reviewing, but also for favouriting and following this story.

Chapter 9

When Jack came to the next time, he felt Macs hand on his. He wiggled his fingers a little and was rewarded with the sound of Macs deep voice. „Hey bud, you awake?"

Jack slowly opened his eyes. It was weird waking up in an hospital bed and lying on your stomach. Mac leaned forward, so he was in Jacks line of vision. „How are you feeling Jack? Are you in pain?"

As if taking the word as a cue, his back began screaming in pain so much it took Jacks breath away. He couldn't answer his friend, while riding out the wave of agony that ripped through his body. His breathing got even more laboured and his heart rate shot up. Mac felt helpless. He rubbed the back of Jacks hand and whispered. „Try to take slow deep breaths Jack!" He advised his friend and pushed the call button. Mac reached out his hand an laid it on Jacks head, careful not to disturb all the lines that went into the Deltas neck. It seemed to help some, because Jacks breathing evened out a bit. „Thanks," he muttered. „…s was bad."

„I bet," Mac retorted. „Are you with me bud?"

„Yeah" Jacks voice was hoarse and Mac reached for a cup of ice chips and offered one to his partner.

„Good," the cool wetness felt great on Jacks dry throat. „Another," he asked his friend after a short time and Mac complied.

The door opened and Doc Ward walked in. „Look who's finally awake," he smiled warmly.

It was awkward for Jack not to be able to see much from his position, but he recognized the voice of the older man. „I'm glad to see you didn't try to get up on your own this time." Jack frowned.

Mac explained. „Last time you woke up you tried to get out of bed and almost did a faceplant to the floor." That sounded vaguely familiar to Jack. He remembered seeing Mac in the bed beside him. Immediately concern washed over him. „Mac, are you ok? Why are you in ICU?"

The blond agent patted Jacks hand reassuringly. „Calm down brother. Good old Doc Ward here didn't have the heart to separate us."

The physician interrupted. „I knew, Mac wouldn't stay in bed and rest in another room, so I decided to bunk him down with you, but only if he promised to get some rest."

„Ok, I want a detailed report on his injuries Doc," demanded Jack. The doc laughed and held up his hands. „Concussion, broken ribs and bruises. He's gonna be ok, Jack." Then the physician sobered. „It's you who had us pretty worried. How do you feel?"

„Like death warmed up," Jack replied honestly.

„Well, that's not far from the truth. You coded on the flight back, but Paul and Mac brought you back. We operated on your back and it seems, that we have the infection under control now. Your fever is almost gone, but you've got fluid in your lungs, that's why we need you to sit up again. I know it sucks, but I'm gonna give you another dose of drugs, it'll take the edge off."

Jack had problems to process everything the doc told him. His brain was still foggy. „Coding? Oh man, I'm sorry, you had to deal with it Mac."

The blond agent just nodded, not able to utter a word, because the memory was still to fresh on his mind.

Jack felt the rush of the meds and the pain in his back lessened a bit. The Doctor and the nurse stepped to the side of the bed. „Ok Jack, let's get this over with." The Delta braced himself for the pain he thought, but when they lifted him, it felt like someone had poured lava over his back. He couldn't suppress a cry of pain and everything went gray. Dimly he was aware of Mac mumbling soothing words and rubbing his hand. The pain took his breath away and he felt like he was suffocating. The nurse opened the oxygen to the maximum and Mac tried to coach him to take deep breaths. After what felt like an eternity, everything settled down and Jack was able to take in his surroundings again. He saw the worried look on Macs pale face, the tears shimmering in his eyes and felt guilty for being the cause of this. „Sorry," Jack whispered. Confused Mac asked: „What are you sorry for?" „Doinˋ this to you" Mac shook his head. „It's ok Jack. Just hang on, it'll get better, but you mustn't give up, ok? Promise me Jack!" He urged.

„Promise," Jack would promise Mac everything to make him feel better. And he always kept his promises. The room began to spin and Jack felt his grip on reality fade, this time he welcomed the pain free darkness.

„He's out," cried Mac. Doctor Ward reassured the blond. „It's ok Mac. His blood pressure is still low and the motion of sitting up and the pain it causes was to much for his body to handle." Carefully the doc lowered Jack back down with the help of the nurse. Then he ordered Mac back to his own bed and the agent didn't argue about it. A clear sign how exhausted he was.

An hour later Matty entered the room and was surprised to see that Jack was awake and watched his partner sleeping. She sat down on a chair between the two beds. Jacks eyes were filled with pain and he was ghostly pale. Matty reached for his hand and softly said. „Good to see you awake, Jack. How are you?" She knew it was a stupid question to ask, but she didn't know where to start.

„He looks like sixteen, when he's sleeping. It's even worse when he's injured." Jack didn't answer her question, but he shifted his glance to Matty. „You're right Jack, but he's a grown man, a very capable agent."

„I know, but there's still this little scared kid in him. Worried for the people he cares about and terrified that he's gonna be abandoned again. He tries so hard not to show it, but sometimes he fails." Jack muttered. „How could his Dad do this to him? He's … he's a gift and this idiot just walked away from him, when he needed him so badly."

Matty retorted. „He has you now and that's all he needs."

„I failed him and Riley, Matty. The same as I've failed you. I ….argh" A wave of pain washed over Jack, so bad his whole body tensed, but this made the pain even worse. The healing process had started, the wounds scabbing over and straining the skin. The pain had been slowly building up over the last minutes but Jack refused to push the button on the pump, that held the drugs to relieve his pain.

„Easy Jack, when did you have your last dose of meds?"

„Don wan it," Jack wheezed, sweat breaking out on his forehead.

„Jack, take the drugs. You need them, no need to prove it to us that you are tough." Matty tried to reason with him.

„Not that, drugs make me sleepy, wanna be ´wake when Mac wakes up." His Texas drawl was another indication how much the Delta was hurting.

„Enough! Do you want Mac to wake up and see you in such agony? Is that what you want?" Matty resolutely pushed the button on the PCA pump and Jack felt the rush of the drugs streaming through his veins. His eyes filled with tears and were showing the guilt he felt at his boss words. „No, didn think o´ that, sry." Matty gently cupped Jacks face and leaned in closer. „You have nothing to be sorry for Jack and you didn't fail anybody. We're gonna have a long talk about everything that happened, but you have to get better first, ok?" Her heart broke, when she saw how much her old friend was hurting. Pain tearing him apart, not only his body, but his soul as well. She couldn't hold back a silent tear, that rolled down her face. Jacks eyes were starting to close slowly, but he forced them open once more. „Make sure, kid stays in bed, needs rest, ´s done in." Matty nodded. „I will." With a sigh Jack gave in to his bodys needs and vaguely felt something on his forhead. „You rest too, Rodeo," the small woman mumbled and pressed a kiss on his brow.

Jack awoke to a silent humming. That was a new sound. Pleasantly not annoying like the damn heart monitor. He opened his eyes and saw Riley sitting in the chair beside his bed, wearing earbuds and humming to a song playing on her phone. When the hacker noticed that Jack was awake, she ripped them out and leaned forward. „Hey, finally awake sleepy head?" She asked with a smile.

„There's not much else to do for a guy here. No TV, because of Macs concussion and to be honest our genius endless lectures about science are tiring as well. How you doing honey?"

„I'm fine Jack, really just bruises and they are fading. I'm already back at work, that's why I wasn't here before. I'm really sorry, I didn't visit you earlier, but there was a security problem I had to fix first. I didn't want Murdoc to be able to simply walk in here, when you're laid up. But everything is fine now, don't worry," she smiled.

„Good work Riles. How are you doing apart from the bruises?" Jack observed her sharply.

Riley looked down. „Not a mission I wanna be reminded to."

„I get it. Being tied to a chair and not knowing, what that asshole is gonna do to you next …"

Riley interrupted almost angrily. „It's not about what he did to me. It's what he did to you Jack." She brushed away some tears. Jack reached out a hand and Riley grabbed it like it was a lifesaver. He rubbed his thumb over her palm. „It's ok hun. He's dead. He can't hurt any of us again."

„I know Jack, it's just that I can't get it out of my head. The sound of … the whip … all that blood … and then on the plane … the sound of the flatline … Mac and Paul working on you. You were dead Jack … dead" She cried openly.

„I'm so sorry that you had to go through this Ri. I wish I could have spared you that. It takes time baby, until the memories fade, but they will. Just remember one thing, there is nothing, I repeat nothing, that you could have done to prevent this. I'll always be there for you, if you need somebody to talk to. Hell, I'll play with you skeeball all night long, when you can't sleep because of the nightmares."

Riley smiled and brushed the last tears away. „Are we talking about you or me Jack?"

„Maybe about both of us."

„I want you to know something Jack. Since Elwood is back, I've spent more time with him and it's kind of nice, that he really seemed to have changed. But he can't never be more than .. I don't know … a fatherly friend or something like that to me. The whole situation with him made it very clear to me, that the only father figure in my life … is you Jack. You're always there to pick up the peaces … or to be a real pain in the ass." She added with a grin.

„Nice definition of the word father." Jack tried to hide his emotions by joking. „No, honestly Riles. I couldn't be prouder to have a daughter like you and I will regret it for the rest of my life, that I left you and your Mom, but back then I thought it was the right decision for you."

„You came back and that's all that matters." Her phone beeped and she sighed. „I need to go. See that you get out of here real soon big guy. That hospital gown makes you look old."

Jack snorted. „Go to work girl and behave yourself!"

„Yes, Daddy!" She grinned and left the room.

Later that day Mac and Jack were talking for a while, when Jack noticed how exhausted the blond was. „Go to bed buddy, you don't need to sit here all the time. Give that big brain of yours a rest."

Mac sighed. „I know, I don't have to. I just want to make sure, you're staying in bed and not do something dumb."

Jack grimaced. „Don't worry about that bro. To be honest, sitting up is like having my back whipped again and again. So I rather stay put, won't be long anyway, before they come and torture me again."

Mac winced at these words. „I wish I could have prevented it."

„Mac, there was no way you could have stopped this from happening. So don't beat yourself up about this. Stop blaming yourself. And I don't want to hear again, that you wish it could have been you instead of me, who got whipped."

Mac sat there open mouthed. „How do you …?"

„I've heard you Mac. I couldn't move or open my eyes, but I've heard you. Apologizing, blaming yourself and …" Jack gulped and had to fight tears „I've heard you crying. It was hard, I just wanted to hug you and tell you that everything would be fine, but I couldn't. Tassilo's dead, Mac. He can't hurt anybody ever again. If anybody is to blame, it's me brother. If I had done my job properly all these years ago, then none of this would have happened."

Mac got angry. „Alright, you want me to stop blaming myself, but you get the right to do it? No way, partner! It wasn't your fault in Montana and neither was it your fault now. Don't go down that dark alley again bud. I won't let you. Tassilo was a monster, you stopped him from killing Matty, Riley and me. Mission accomplished, simple as that. So stop it Jack. No more beating yourself up about it. You've already paid enough for it. The injuries you suffered back then and you almost paid with your life this time. You have to let go of your guilt, buddy. You need all your strength for healing up. There are still a lot of bad guys we need to stop out there. You got me?"

Jack nodded and a slight smile appeared on his face. „When did you get so wise kid?"

Mac grinned. „I've met a guy back in the sandbox, I thought at first, that he was just a dumb Texan cowboy, but he taught me a thing or two about life."

„Thanks Mac, honestly I don't know where I would be today without you. You've made me see the good things in life again, I was in a dark place back then. Thanks buddy."

„Dito, Jack. I think, I'm gonna lie down for a bit. Are we good?"

„We're good bro."

Mac shuffled over to his bed and climbed in, when he heard Jacks voice again.

„And Mac, can you do me a favour?" „Yeah, what is it Jack?"

„Next time brush your teeth after you puked, before you snuggle up with me." Jack chuckled.

Mac face went beet red and he stammered. „I … sorry Jack … I …"

„Go to sleep kiddo."

Please let me know what you think! Only one more chapter and you've made it.


	10. Chapter 10

AN:

Hi guys. Thank you for all the kind words. This is the last chapter of our journey. It almost double the length I usually go, but I couldn't slaughter it so here you go. Enjoy!

Chapter 10

Ten days after waking up in ICU Jack has finally been allowed to leave Phoenix Medical. Mac had been discharged almost a week before, but had spent most of the time with the Delta anyway. He walked into the room carrying a gym bag with Jacks clothes. „Ready to wear real clothes again brother?"

„You bet. I just hate these hospital gowns, make you feel naked although you wearing something, weird."

Mac sighed. „I know what you mean. You need a helping hand?" He knew Jack was in no state to get dressed alone, but he wanted it to be his partners decision. Since he was able to sit up and lay on his back on a pile of pillows, the doctors had put his arm in a sling to immobilize his injured shoulder. The GSW was healing nicely, but moving the arm around was painful for Jack.

The Delta nodded. „Yeah, moving around to much still sucks big time bro."

Mac agreed. „I bet." He grabbed the bag and took out a soft shirt. Jack shed the hospital gown with slow careful movements and Mac helped him into the shirt, trousers and put his shoes on. „Ready?"

„Yeah, take me home bro," Jack sighed. He knew, he wouldn't go home for probably a few weeks. The Delta had agreed to stay at Macs place as long as he wasn't fit enough to take care of himself. Although it wasn't easy to admit it, they had known each other too long, had nursed each other back to health too often enough, to fight Mac on this.

The blond agent grabbed the wheelchair and put a cushion in the back of it. Jack watched with fondness, how Mac thought to make it easier for him. „Thanks buddy."

Mac smiled. „It seems Bozer has bought every single pillow in LA to make you comfortable. He got up at five in the morning and started cooking."

„Good ol' Boze, I missed the guy," Jack stated. Bozer had returned from his training only two days prior. Although Jack was doing way better by then, the new agent was still shocked to the core, by Jacks fragile appearance. The Delta had clearly lost weight, his complexion was still awfully pale. And everybody could see the pain he was in, when he was moving. The doctors had taken him of the heavy opiates and moved on to other meds. Jack was able to focus better now, but the drugs didn't help as much with the pain. The fact, that Jack didn't complain about the wheelchair was another sign, how bad he felt.

It was hard on Mac to see his partner hurt so much. He wasn't as good as Jack in nursing and to be honest it usually was himself who needed the care. But they were familiy and so Riley, Bozer and even Matty had declared to help Mac, in getting their team mate back on his feet.

Mac winced as he helped Jack into the Jeep and his partner wasn't able to suppress a groan. „I feel like a hundred years old," he complained.

„Well you're not that far away, old man," Mac joked in an attempt to lighten the mood and distract Jack from his aches. „You're just jealous, that you missed growing up in the golden 80's. Oh man, great music, no cell phones, no internet …"

„No style, I mean have you looked at the fashion, grrr" Mac shook.

Jack raised a brow. „Really? I mean have you looked in the mirror lately Mac? You're dressed like my grandpa. I wouldn't take a fashion advice from you, if I were blind bro."

„Ha, ha. Nothing wrong with my style."

„Yeah, if you were a seventy year old Texan farmer," Jack smirked.

„I'll let your grandpa know, what you think of his style, when we visit next time." Mac shot back.

„Only if you want to sleep in the hayloft." Mac shrugged. „With the rats," Jack added and enjoyed the look of horror on Macs face.

„Ok, I won't tell him, happy?"

„Yup. You are even driving like my grandpa," Jack added silently.

„I've heard you," Mac retorted but smiled. He was happy, they were back to their usual banter. He knew there was a tough road ahead for Jack, but at least it was a start.

When they finally reached Macs apartment, Jack was dead on his feet. The ride from the hospital and all that moving around had taken a toll on him. The Delta began to sway on his feet before they reached the door and Mac steadied him with his arm under Jacks elbow. He would rather slung Jacks arm over his shoulder, but he knew that would cause his friend only more pain, so he just lend a helping hand and watched him closely.

Inside the door Riley and Bozer had hung a Welcome-home-Jack-sign, which brought tears to the tough soldiers eyes. Riley stepped forward and kissed Jack on his cheek, she longed to return the hug, but instead she let her hands rest on Jacks hips. „Great to see you in normal clothes again big guy. Baby blue simply isn't your color." She tried to lighten the mood. „Yeah, you're right girl. Not good for my tough guy image." He smiled and gave her neck a gentle sqeeze.

Next was Bozer. He leaned shortly into Jack and stepped back with a fist bump, that Jack returned. „Good to have you home, bro." He turned into the kitchen again and wiped at his wet eyes. Mac registered that Jack started to tremble with the effort to stay upright. „Do you want to go to your room or the couch Jack?"

„Couch," was all the Delta managed. The room started to spin and he was sure, he wouldn't be able to make it to the guest room without passing out, an experience he wanted to spare himself and his friends. With Macs and Rileys help he stumbled over to the couch and they carefully lowered him on the heap of pillows, that Bozer had already put there. Mac sat down on the coffee table and talked to Jack while Riley joined Bozer in the kitchen.

Jack couldn't process what Mac was saying. He was sweating, black spots were dancing before his eyes and he felt the blood rushing through his ears. The pain in his back was pure agony and took his breath away. He felt Mac rubbing his good arm and slowly everything settled down and he was able to focus on his friend.

„…you with me Jack? Easy partner, deep breaths." Mac tried to soothe him.

Jack nodded. „…'m good now, trip took a bit out of me." He breathed.

Mac smiled. „It's ok bud. I'll get you your meds and then you can sleep a bit, ok?" The blond took the bag from the counter and shook three pills out of three different bottles. Jack was still on antibiotics, because the danger of infection still lingered. The docs had insited on two different pains meds, one of them should help with the swelling in Jacks back.

Jack took the drugs and washed them down with the water Mac had handed him. He sank back with a sigh and winced as he tried to find a halfway comfortable position. Jack leaned back his head and closed his eyes, the muffled sounds and silent chatter from the kitchen soon lulled him to sleep.

An hour later Jack began to moan and toss his head around, his face contorted in pain. His whole body began to flinch and everybody knew, what the nightmare was about. Mac carefully approached Jack and began to speak words of comfort accompanied by rubbing his arm in a soothing manner. Jacks eyes opened and he looked around groggily, clearly not able to focus on anything at first.

„It's ok Jack. Take your time, your safe. We're good, buddy. Just relax." Words he often heard from Jack, when Mac was the one fighting his way back out of a nightmare. The blond agent also knew, how hard it was to get a grip on reality, when you woke up under the influence of drugs. Boundaries were blurring and it was difficult to tell, what was real and what was not. Memories, nightmares and fears were creating a frightening mix, which was not easy to untangle when you weren't able to form a coherent thought.

„We came back from the hospital, didn't we?" Jack asked confused.

„Yeah, I took you home today." Mac reassured him.

Jack nodded and reached for the water bottle, a sharp stabbing in his back stopped the movement and he grabbed the edge of the coffee table to hold back a cry. The wounds on his back were healing, but the new layer of skin was thin and very sensitive, feeling to tight to move properly. He took a few deep breaths until the pain turned into a dull ache, that was easier to tolerate. Mac watched helplessly, holding out the water bottle to his friend and looking at him concerned.

Jack took the bottle and gulped it down. „Thanks bro," he breathed and moved to stand up.

„Whoa, where do you think you're going big guy?" Mac tried to push him down. Jack got angry and slapped his hands away. „I need to use the bathroom, or do you want me to pee on the couch?"

„I'm sorry Jack. Let me help you," Mac offered with a guilty look on his face. Jacks expression softened. „It's ok Mac. I'm gonna be hurting for some time to come and there's not much we can do about it. That's just another bump in the road. I promise to try and be a good patient, if you promise me not to go all mother hen on me. Do we have a deal?" Jack reached out a fist and Mac bumped it.

With Macs help Jack got to his feet, he had to bit his lip to keep from crying out. The Delta wavered and the blond agent waited patiently, until Jack had found his legs and began to shuffle slowly to the bathroom. „Think you can lend me a hand at having a shower? I smell worse than the locker room at the Phoenix gym."

Mac was happy to do something for his partner and replied eagerly. „Sure Jack, I'll grab fresh clothes for you and you holler, when you ready for me to come in."

After the shower Mac had to practically drag Jack back into the living room. The table was full with Jacks favourite food and they sat down. Although the Delta was not able to eat much he savored the meal. „If you were a girl Bozer, I would ask you to marry me. That was delicious, thanks bro." Bozer beamed proudly and said. „Just tell me what you want and I'm gonna cook it." Everyone of them dealt with the situation differently and if cooking was something he could do to make Jack feel better, so he would happily work in the kitchen all day long.

Jack swallowed another round of meds and let Mac help him to lay down in the guest room. Matty came over for dinner, but Jack was still to groggy to join the conversation. Mac noticed the observing glance of his boss. He knew that Jack and Matty had a lot to process, but he shook his head as Matty looked at the blond agent. His boss nodded in agreement, understanding the silent message, that Jack was not up to deal with an exhausting emotional discussion yet.

Over the next two weeks Jacks physical condition slowly improved, this could not be said about his emotional state. The Delta became withdrawn and sullen, often moody and deep in thought. Bozer and Riley were working, but Mac was still on medical leave due to his concussion and healing ribs. He was really concerned about Jack, because he had never seen his brother in such a depression. The constant nightmares cost him the rest, his body needed so desperately. His complexion was pale and he barely ate. Jacks back was healing, but he still was in a lot of pain. At least he got around the apartment under his own steam now.

Bozer had already left this morning and Mac and Jack were sitting at the table and having another cup of coffee. „Can you drive me over to my apartment tomorrow? I think I can manage on my own now. I've taken advantage of your hospitality long enough." Jack stated.

„No Jack. a) you didn't take advantage of my hospitality b) I don't think you're up to be all by yourself c) I'm still not cleared to drive" Mac tried to reason with his friend.

„Fine, I can call an Uber." Jack answered curtly.

„Jack, let me help you. Talk to me bro, what's eating at you?" Mac pried.

„I'm good. We're good buddy. Don't worry." Jack hated that he was the cause for Mac losing sleep, because of his nightmares. Jack didn't want to be difficult, he just couldn't find his way out of this mess. Everything was … too much, or … was he not enough? Not strong enough? Not fast enough? Not brave enough? Tassilo was dead, why couldn't he shake this mission off, like all the other missions that had gone south. Jack just didn't get it. He had helped Mac numerus times to find his way back, when he was lost. Why couldn't he do it for himself?

Stifly Jack rose and walked with slow deliberate steps out to the deck and sank onto one of the chairs. Mac sat at the table, and watched as his friend held his head in his hands. A picture of pure misery. It broke Macs heart to see his friend in this state. Determined he grabbed his phone and called his boss. „Matty, this is Mac. Jack needs you. Now." „On my way."

Matty hadn't visited Jack since his first evening home, she wanted to give him time to heal and reflect on the things that had happened. To come to terms with the whole Tassilo thing. She sighed. At least that was what she was wanting herself to believe. Coward, she scolded herself. She just simply dreaded the confrontation with Jack and facing their mutual ghosts of the past.

When she knocked on the door, Mac opened, concern written all over his face. „That bad, huh?" She asked. „Worse," Mac answered. „I've never seen him like this before. It's hard to describe, when we came back from the sandbox, we both had our issues. It was hard to find the way back into a normal life, with all the things we had done and seen over there. It's not only this mission, Matty. I think it has more to do with Montana, that's why I've called you. He's in a really dark place. He's not eating and sleeping, he's getting worse not better. Honestly, I don't know what to do. Would you talk to him?"

Matty nodded. „I should have done it sooner, I'm sorry Mac." She took a deep breath and walked out to the deck. At first she thought Jack was asleep, and just stood there watching. She had to admit, Mac didn't exaggerate with the description of Jacks condition. Deep lines of pain and maybe worry were embedded deeply into his face. His normal tan skin was replaced by a sickly pale complexion. But what her shocked the most, were his hands. His wrists so thin and fragile, she couldn't believe they belonged to Jack. The once powerful hands, that had sent a lot of his enemies into dreamland with only one punch, were shaking. Matty had never seen Jacks hands shake. They were deadly weapons, able to hold absolutely still for two days straight until one move of the trigger finger sealed the fate of a foe.

„Seen enough?" The curt words startled Matty and she needed a moment to compose herself. She sat down beside Jack and turned to face him.

„Yeah and to be honest I don't like what I see." The moment, she uttered the words Matty regretted them. „I'm sorry, Jack. That came out all wrong."

„Don't worry. I don't like it either, when I look into the mirror these days." The look Jack shot her was not accusing, just … empty.

„That's not like you Jack, to feel sorry for yourself and wallow in self pity."

„I don't. I …just … I don't know … that probably sounds stupid, but it's like I can't face myself anymore." He admitted.

Matty laid a hand on his arm and said softly. „Maybe you should face your past and make your peace with it, to be able to look forward again."

„Are you serious? I mean, we both know, how I messed up back then. You don't have to remind me. Hell, you couldn't even look me in the eye after what I had done to you. I don't blame you for that."

„Jack, I've made a huge mistake. What do you remember of the flight back to the CIA?"

Jack shrugged. „Not much, after I got you on the chopper. I think I passed out somewhere along the way. I don't even remember the first week in hospital. Why?"

Matty sighed. „I found out, that you still blame yourself, for what Tassilo did to me. You started to cry, when we were in the helicopter. You apologized over and over again, saying that everything was your fault. On the whole ride back I tried to get it into your head that nothing absolutely nothing Tassilo did to me was your fault. Jack, you saved my life. You shot Tassilo and then you took me to exfil. I wouldn't have survived out there, and I still wonder how you managed, considering how serious your own injuries were. I thought, I've managed to convince you and you seemed to believe me, but I didn't realize that your head injury made you forget our talk. I was out in the field again, when you were better and we didn't saw a lot of each other. The few times we've met, you were so distant and I thought you blamed me for Montana. If it weren't for me you wouldn't have almost cut your hands off, just to get free. I didn't handle the situation well and I thought it would be better to simply try to forget that mission and bury the memories."

Matty wiped away a tear before she continued. „It didn't work out, because I simply couldn't forget about it. I wanted to thank you for saving my life and try to make things right between us. But when I came back from a mission, you had already left for Afghanistan. When I got the job offer to become director of the Phoenix, I really looked forward to it. Until I sat at my desk and looked into the folders of my team. When I opened that file and saw your picture, I felt the urge to ran away. I was ashamed Jack, that I've never tried to contact you in all these years. I didn't know how you would react, when we would meet again and so I did, what I do best. Attack is the best form of defense. I pushed my feelings aside and was really tough on you. I'm so sorry, that you thought I was blaming you." Matty reached out and grabbed his hand, her sleeve slipped back and revealed the burn marks on her forearms. Jack stared at the scars, gulping hard. „Believe me Jack I never did. I could kick myself, that I didn't realize, that you must have forgotten our conversation in the chopper. Carrying that guilt with you all these years, I'm sorry Jack. I'm so sorry." Tears were streaming down her face and she made no move to wipe them away.

Jack felt his heart break and pulled Matty into a tight embrace. Ignoring the bolts of pain, that were shooting through his back. They held each other for a long time, crying and healing together.

Matty pulled back and was about to pull her sleeves over her scars again, but Jack reached out a hand and stopped her movement. Hesitantly he began to touch the marks, gently caressing the marred skin with his thumb. „I've always thought you hid them, because it was a reminder of how I had failed you." Jack whispered.

Matty shook her head. „No, Jack. I feared it would make you uncomfortable, I wanted to spare you the thought of Tassilo."

Jack looked up. „There wasn't one single day I didn't think about him. When I learned that he was back, everything became to much and I broke down in the war room. I had these nightmares all that years and I think I somehow knew, that he was alive and would come back." Jack closed his eyes for a moment, he was totally exhausted.

„The first few weeks after Montana were a blur, I was told that I had a high fever, because of the infection in my hands. The concussion added to my confusion, I couldn't tell what was reality and what was a dream, everything blended together. As I got better I remembered bits and pieces, but not the talk on the flight back, sorry. It wasn't your fault, that we couldn't make things right. I avoided you, I couldn't face you. You had a new partner and I thought, that you wouldn't want to work with me anyway, if you couldn't trust me to have your back. I had my debrief several months after the mission, because of my memory issues. One of the CIA pen-pushers had been interrogating me all day long, the questions got more and more accusing and at one point I lost it. He asked me why I didn't protect a defenseless woman of short stature. As much as I blamed myself for what had happened, it wasn't about your height, never has been. How could this asshole name you a defenseless woman of short stature? You've always been a force Matty. A solid partner, I could rely on and this moron reduced you to THAT. Well, I couldn't let him talk shit behind your back so I broke his nose. I've already made up my mind, before the debrief to go back to Afghanistan and after that incident the agency wasn't interested in keeping me employed there any longer. I thought it would be best to leave it all behind, same as you. And then bam! Matty the hun is your new boss Dalton. To be honest, my first impulse was to sign up for another tour. But that wasn't really an option, because I promised Mac to never leave him. I probably could have talked him into leaving Phoenix. Do you know the main reason I stayed Matty?"

Matty shook her head. „I have no idea Jack."

„Trust. This team had been through so much with Nicki and then the betrayal of Thornton. And after I thought about you as our new boss, I knew we were lucky. I've always trusted you with my life and I needed someone like you on my side with all these kids," Jack pointed into the living room „to look after and I trusted you to have our backs. Even if it meant bending the rules when neccessary. I can count on you to never let us down. I knew I had to come to terms with our past, but I couldn't bring myself to talk to you about it. As we got used to each other again and our working relationship got more relaxed, I decided it was the best not to open up old wounds."

Matty smiled. „We were both stubborn idiots, weren't we?"

„Yeah and cowards, Matty." Jack agreed not able to suppress a yawn.

„You look like shit old man." Matty couldn't keep the concern out of her voice.

„That's what I love about you boss. No sugar coating. Tell you what, I'm too old to get my ass whipped."

„If you manage to get whipped again, I'm gonna skin you alive Dalton."

„You're a mean woman Matty. I almost regret breaking that pen-pushers nose."

„Shut up Jack."

„Yes boss, just one more question. Can we agree not to mention Montana ever again?"

„You mean like Cairo?"

„We don't speak about Cairo! And we don't speak about Montana, ok?"

„Nice try, but you won't get a day off, because it is Montana-Day, Jack."

„Well it was worth a try."

They both sat back and enjoyed the view. A comfortable silence surrounded them. Tassilo was dead and they had finally made their peace about Montana.

Mac stepped out onto the deck and smiled at the sight. Jack was sleeping, his head resting on Mattys shoulder, their hands still entwined. Matty smiled and nodded. The Phoenix family was whole again.

Please let me know what you think.


End file.
